Confidential Jokes

His dad replies, “Well, you’re my son – I’m confident about that. And your best friend Jimmy is also my son – that’s confidential.”

Employee: "Don't worry, I'm equally ashamed of it."

I can't tell you why.

Son to Dad: Dad, what is the difference between "confident" & "confidential"?

Dad: See, here is an example, you are my son, i am confident of that.

Son: I see

Dad: Now, you know our neighbor, little Timmy, your playmate right?

Son: Yah?

Dad: He's my son too, bu... read more

The dad explains:
You are my son of that I am confident.
Your friend Billy across the street is also my son, that is Confidential

edit grammar for /r/Fudgegoblin

A father and son were having breakfast one morning when the son asked: "Dad, what's the difference between confident and confidential?" Thinking about it for a bit, the father replied: "Well... You are my son, and of that I am confident. Now, your friend Johnny is also my son. That's confidential... read more

Well I thought about it carefully and said “as I am your Dad, you are my daughter, of that I am Confident. Your friend Sally down the street is also my daughter, that is Confidential!”

He asks his father, "Dad, what's the difference between confident and confidential?"

Dad puts his book down. Pauses for a bit.

"You're my son. Of that, I'm confident."

"Yeah," says the son.

"Your best friend, Paul, he's also my son. That is confidential."

"Sir, we can't tell you about our police operations. Those are confidential."

"Oh my bad, I just wondered whether it was mother's day..."

The House of Cards they had built in Hollywoodland has now made them The Usual Suspects in Sin City. This was supposed to be LA Confidential but apparently they couldnt find Consenting Adults. The American Beauty of this is that they will now forever be Inglorious Basterds.

Neither did I, Doctor-patient confidentiality.

I'm sorry, it's confidential.

The doctor gives him a clean bill of health, and sends him on his way. He returns a week later to get a second opinion. Another doctor confirms the first's findings. He comes back for a *third* rectal examination, swearing something is amiss, only to once again be given a clean bill of health. On th... read more

They were laying outside on a field one day comparing their intelligence when David turned to Nikolay.

He told Nikolay that he had a higher iq so he must be smarter. Nikolay just laughed and told him there was only one way to tell who was smarter. They must go to a canyon and cross it, the fi... read more

He spends all day cutting logs and splitting them and stacking them, and as he's winding down for the day he sees an elderly Indian watching him silently from over the fence. So he goes over and says "How?" and the Indian says "How. Gottum smoke?" and the farmer hands over a pouch of tobacco, and th... read more

There once was a secret government program that tried to create perfect soldiers through genetic modification, cloning, and strenuous conditioning.
What they wanted to achieve was the normal super soldier run down:
- Super strong
- Super fast
- Super smart
- Super obedient
They s... read more