UPJOKE
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Caulk Jokes

What do you call someone who overpays for caulk?

A caulk sucker

My wife asked for black caulk for her birthday

I can't find it at Lowe's or Home Depot.

Did you hear about the newlywed couple that didn’t know the difference between KY lube and silicone caulk?

Their windows fell out.

Why can't contractors shoot each other with sealant?

Because caulk fighting is illegal.

Why did the guy get fired from the hardware store?

He asked a female customer if she needed caulking.

I was shocked when I heard my wife tell me about the handyman exposing himself to her.

She told me he showed her his caulk...and told her we needed more.

My girlfriend's roommate wouldn't let me redo their bathroom tiles.

What a caulk block.

Why did Mario get fired from being a plumber?

He never put his caulk away.

What do you call a death row inmate who knows how to weatherproof?

Dead man caulking.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An extravagant billionaire made his fortunes selling concrete. Life got lavish and boring. One day he gets in an argument with another bored gentleman about the possibility of creating a flying airplane out of concrete. Billionaire gets excited and decides to build one whatever it takes.

First, he goes to an American aerospace company.

"Can you build an airplane out of concrete?"
"That's going to be very difficult."
"I don't care how difficult. Can you?"
"That will cost $3 bln. and will take 3 years".
"OK, fine".

3 years and $3 bln later, on time ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A failing zoo was desperate to drive attendance.

After much discussion, they finally purchased a gnu from Africa.

In anticipation of its arrival, the zoo built a new exhibit for the hard-to-obtain animal. It was a beautiful indoor/outdoor enclosure and contractors worked diligently to meet the deadline of the animal’s arrival.

Unfort...

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