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Camping Trip Jokes

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are on a camping trip

After a hearty meal and a good bottle of wine, they lay down to sleep.
Suddenly, in the middle of the night, Holmes wakes his trusted companion and asks "Watson, what do you see?" Rubbing his sleepy eyes, Watson answers: "I see millions and millions of stars."
"Correct, Watson, and what do...

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NSFW Two guys are on a camping trip...

And on the last day, they can't decide on what to do. So one decides he'll go for a lonely walk in the forest, while the other goes to a mountain lake.

When they meet up in the evening, the forest guy is "Hey, how did your day go?"

"Awesome. I went to this mountain lake, and there was...

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decide to go on a camping trip.

After dinner and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and go to sleep.

Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.

"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

Watson replied, "I see millions of stars."

"What does that tell you?"
...

I went on a camping trip to try to save the dolphins.

It was a waste of time for all in tents and porpoises.

If you get nostalgic about childhood camping trips…..

you are just living in the past tents.

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Three couples go on a camping trip.

On their last day, the men decide they want to go explore a cave, while the women choose to hang out at the campsite.

After a while of exploring the cave, it forked into 3 different paths. The men agree to all follow one path and meet up in an hour to tell the others what they had found.
<...

Camping Trip

I was so excited, my teen son said he wanted us to go camping so we could spend time together.

I just didn't realize we would be camping at Best Buy so we can buy a PS5 tomorrow morning.

Two Men on a Camping Trip See a Bear Heading In Their Direction.

The first guy starts to panic, while the second guy calmly begins to lace up his sneakers.

First guy: "Are you crazy? You can't outrun that bear."

Second guy: "No, but I can outrun you."

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Me and my wife decided to spice up our camping trip by having sex

It was fucking in tents

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a newly wed couple decided to spend their honeymoon on a camping trip

it was fucking intense

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Jake and Dave on a camping trip (NSFW!)

Jake and Dave were on a camping trip. On the last day of their trip, they couldn't decide what to do. Jake wanted to go to the beach, Dave wanted to go hiking. So they split up for the day.

They met back up late at night at camp. Jake was like "Dude, my day was AWESOME! I went to the beach an...

A man got lost on a camping trip

A man got lost on a camping trip. Rescuers scoured the wilderness until a medical emergency team finally spotted a solitary figure across a wide chasm.

“Charlie Smith,” someone shouted, “is that you?”

“Yes, it is,” came the reply. “Who are you?”

“We're from the Red Cross.” ...

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Fred and George went on a camping trip.

After a long day of trekking, they laid their camp, had dinner and went off to sleep for the night.

Later however, George was awakened by a nudge from Fred.

Fred: What do you see, George?

George: I see the moonless sky, the stars.

Fred: ...and?

George: ..and..the c...

The Camping Trip

Four friends spend weeks planning the perfect desert camping and riding trip.


Two days before the group is to leave Rob's wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn't going.


Rob's friends are very upset that he can't go, but what can they do.


Two days later the thr...

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Two guys on a camping trip

It's a calm night, the moon is gently lighting the hills.

3 AM. Suddenly the tent starts shaking. One of the guys turn the light on and ask to the other:

- What are you doing? Are you masturbating?
- Yes
- So use your own dick please

Three married businessmen meet for their annual camping trip.

As they see each other only this time of the year, they have a lot to talk about. On their last day in the woods, the men decide to go for a little walk. Suddenly, they hear someone whimper. They follow the noise to a well and with combined efforts, they rescue a little fairy from its ground.
...

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Holmes and Watson are out on a camping trip

Finally away from work, Dr Watson and Sherlock Holmes decide to spend there time off the great outsiders They set up their camp, get a fire roaring, put up their tent and get ready for the evening in the wild. After a nice meal, the two detectives decide it’s time to head on to bed. They both crawl ...

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"If i took you on a camping trip..."

"... and you woke up the next day with an empty tub of vaseline beside ya and a sore ass. what would you tell people when you got back home?"

when i was told this one i replied "I was never on a camping trip, is what i would tell them"

my friend then replied "Great, lets go camping!"...

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Butch, Jimmy, and Joe go on a camping trip.

Butch and Jimmy are collecting firewood when out of nowhere, a venomous snake bites Jimmy on the tip of his penis.

Jimmy: "I'm bit! It got my penis - oh my god, what do I do?!"

Butch: "Joe will know what to do! I'll go ask him!"

Butch rushes back to their campsite and finds Joe...

I went on a camping trip with my wife, kids, and mother-in-law.

At night, my wife awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to me, she insisted on trying to find her mother. I picked up my rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her.

In a clearing not far from the camp, we came upon a chilling sight, the mother-in-law was backed up against a t...

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Two guys are on a camping trip...

and are at each others throats. Seeing as they've been best friends for years, they know how to handle the situation. Both agree to sleep on it, part ways in the morning and meet for dinner after blowing off some steam.

So later that night, they tell each other about their respective days. "M...

How do you keep a Mormon from drinking all your beer on a camping trip?

Take two of them with you.

So Pete, Joe, and Dave are planning their desert hiking/camping trip.

Dave ask Pete what he was bringing.

"Well, my tent, lil cooker, some water and a bottle of Irish whiskey... in case of rattlesnakes."

Dave ask Joe what he was bringing. "Water, sunscreen, my pack, extra socks and a bottle of Scotch whiskey... in case of rattlesnakes."

The two ot...

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3 couples go on a camping trip...

When the 3 couples get to the camp site they all unpack and one of the couples realizes that they left their tent at home. So the 3 couples agree that with the 2 tents that the men will sleep in one tent and the women will sleep in the other. In the middle of the night one of the men wakes up exci...

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I just got back from a weekend camping trip with a bunch of swingers.

It was fucking in tents.

Jack and Dan are on a camping trip in the woods, when Dan passes out

Jack calls the Ambulance and reports the accident

The Ambulance tells him, " Make sure he is actually dead'

Jack leaves the phone and the Ambulance hear a shot

Jack says, "Now what?"

Sherlock Holmes and Watson are on a camping trip...

and in the middle of the night, Sherlock nudges Watson awake. He says "Watson, look up, and tell me what you see."

Watson says "well, I see the stars, and that makes me think about our place in the universe. In the face of such cosmic vastness, aren't we really just insignificant? And what o...

Did you hear about the lawyer that got lost on a camping trip with one of his clients?

He was found with criminal in-tent.

My overzealous friends and I were playing hide & seek on our camping trip.

It was really in tents.

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I thought I’d try going to a swingers camping trip, but I was too shy to participate.

It was two fucking in tents for me.

A man was arrested after planning to kill his friend while on a camping trip....

He's being charged with intense intents in tents.

I was banned from being a Scout leader after a baking mishap on a joint group weekend camping trip.

I fudged a Brownie.

What do you get when an argument occurs on a camping trip?

A tents atmosphere

I was talking via sign language with a one armed man…

Problem is I was only getting half of what he was saying.


Thought this up yesterday on a camping trip when my daughter was showing me what she learned at preschool.

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Did you hear about the insatiable couple who had sex at least five times a day but was forced by their families to go on a camping trip in order to get them out of the house?

It was fucking in tents.

Three vampires are sitting on the graveyard wall.

Three vampires are sitting on the graveyard wall.


The first says that he is really hungry and flys into the night. After half an hour he returns and his mouth is full of blood. The other two ask him: "where did you get that?" He answers: "Do you see that little light across the hill? It w...

Freshman from rival colleges...

...were each camping out around their fires on opposite banks of a river.

The freshman on the left bank got to talking. The first student points toward the river and says, "You know, I heard that the students that go to that school are all idiots."

The second student says "Yeah! I hear...

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Fucking wife's hot friend

A guy had a crush on his wife's hot friend, so he invited her for a camping trip.
while camping he wanted to get rid of his wife so he told her:Honey, why don't you go grab us some flowers? as soon as the wife went.

husband: I'll give you 20$ for a blowjob

friend: No

husband...

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Her: If you hear something in the woods, you tell me. if you hear something in the water, you tell me. But under no circumstances are you allowed to take off your blindfold.

Him: All this just because you forgot to pack your makeup for our camping trip?

John's wife won't let him go fishing with his buddies

They have all went together on a fishing/camping trip the past four years together. But this year she wouldn't let him. The guys were very disappointed

Two days later the other guys made it to the campsite and noticed John was sitting by a fire with a cold beer. The tent was already set and s...

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What’s a prostitute?

A family of a mother, father and an 8 year old daughter were planning on going on a camping trip so for the occasion the father orders a story book to tell stories around the camp fire.
When they get to the camp he opens up the book by the fire and begins to read:
“Stacy was a prostitute looki...

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Little Billy was excited to get his Eagle badge but had to pass a final test

Billy and his mates are on a camping trip, when the troop leader said "I have one final test for you, Billy," as he pointed towards a tree. "I need you to identify the front of this tree."

Little Billy walks around the tree, studying it, the troop leader is stumped as Billy proclaims, "obviou...

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Holmes and Watson have been tracking down a thief, who had been reported for stealing camping gear.

Using their marvellous detective work, they uncover the thief’s hoard of stolen camping gear, and are immediately praised. To celebrate their victory, Watson decides to take Holmes on a camping trip, using the criminal’s tent.

They pitch their tent under the stars and go to sleep. In the midd...

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. As they lay down for the night, the fire dwindling nearby, Holmes said: "Watson, look up and tell me what you see".

Watson said "I see a fantastic panorama of countless of stars".

Holmes: "And what does that tell you?"

Watso...

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3 guys and a witch....

In a small village there is a long standing rumour that the nearby woods was inhabited by a witch, several missing people and some strange smoke from a seemingly abandoned hut had fuel the rumours for years.
One day three local men decided enough was enough and made way to the woods for a few day...

A 911 operator gets a call one morning from a frantic man.

"My friend and I were out on a camping trip and I think he had a heart attack and he might have died and I don't know what to do".

The operator says to him "OK. Stay calm. First lets make sure he is dead".

The man says OK and a minute later the operator hears a gun shot. The man comes ...

John had terrible breath.

One weekend he and his buddy Mark went on a camping trip.

They only had one tent so they would have to sleep together.

John's breath was so bad that Mark couldn't stand it in the small closed space of that tent, so he told John everytime he wanted to say something he should poke him...

Two couples go camping in the woods...

Bob and Peter decide to take their wives on a camping trip. When they get to the campsite, Bob says, "Hey Peter, since your wife has never been camping before, why don't I teach her how to set up camp while you take my wife to get firewood." Peter agrees and he and Bob's wife go out into the fores...

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WHY PEOPLE HATE SCHOOL RE-UNIONS

Jan, Sue and Mary haven't seen each other since leaving school.

They rediscover each other via a reunion website and arrange to meet for lunch in a wine bar.

Jan arrives first, wearing a beige Versace. She orders a bottle of Pinot Grigio.

Sue arrives shortly afterward, in grey...

My Science Book's Favorite Joke

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go on a camping trip. They find a beautiful spot and set up their tent. After a full day of enjoying nature, they go into their tent and fall asleep. Some hours later, Holmes wakes Watson and says, "Look up at the sky and tell me what you see." Watson is awestruck. Af...

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A friend told me this, and he might have got it from reddit so this might be a repost but here it goes [Long]

3 best friends decide to travel to an lonely little island somewhere near the Bahamas in the hopes of having a relaxing camping trip, for old time’s sake.

They arrive by water plane, and the pilot informs them that he’ll be returning to pick them up the next day. The men, happy to finally be ...

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