UPJOKE
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A man is being released from a US hospital.

As he is being escorted out by a nurse, he passes by a patient’s room with the door open and sees that the male patient is masturbating furiously. Confused, he turns to the nurse and asks, “what the hell is going on here?!” The nurse replies, “you see, this man has a serious condition where if he d...

What did the vein say to the pessimistic blood clot?

Ay, be positive.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man has a dangerous blood clot

And needs to have his leg amputated.

Unfortunately, the doctor amputates the wrong leg in surgery. Realizing his mistake while the patient is still under, he amputates the correct leg.

When he comes to, the Dr. says, "Mr. Jones, I have good news and bad news. The bad news is unfortun...

What was the last thing that went through Joseph Stalin’s mind before he died?

A blood clot

My grandad said there’s gangs at his retirement village

The blood clots and the cripples

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