The 12+ Best Artery Jokes

What did the blood cell say before it died in an artery?

I will not die in vein!

The doctors rushed quickly to remove the bullet which was lodged in his artery...

But it turns out it was all in vain

What did the doctor say about the organ donor which died from a clotted artery?

"at least his death wasn't in vein"

I have my own tunnel of love!

Other people call it a severely clogged artery, but I don't care.

The double quarter pounder with cheese from McDonald’s holds a special place in my heart.

Mainly in the Coronary artery.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

TIL Lorena Bobbitts sister also tried to cut off her husband's penis. She missed and hit a major artery, almost killing him.

She was charged with a misdeweiner.

An engineer accidentally gave a medical school exam. See his answers:

1. Antibody - One who hates his body .

2. Artery - Study of Fine Paintings or military, not sure.

3. Bacteria - Back door of a Cafeteria .

4. Coma - Punctuation Mark .

5. Gall Bladder - Bladder of a Girl .

6. Genes - Blue Denim.

7. Labour Pain - Hurt at Work...

I went to my doctor because I had severe chest pain that wasn't going away

I freaked out when he couldn't figure out what it was and ended up referring me to a cardiologist.

The cardiologist ran some labs and scans and told me to wait for the results in his office.

I was relieved when the doctor came back with the results with a huge smile on his face.
...

Never say the lords name in vain.

Instead, say it in artery.

You can make any girl a squirter...

If you cut the right artery...

I own a store that sells crafts painted with blood

It's called the Artery

What do you call a blood vessel with a carrot jammed into it?

A carroted artery.

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