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Archeologists Jokes

Why are the majority of archeologists women?

They have a natural ability to dig up the past.

Elderly folks looking for love should considering targeting archeologists.

They tend to date really old things.

Why don't archeologists get married?

They are only interested in dating.

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Archeologists have just discovered the oldest known tampon.

They just dont know what period it's from.

Why are archeologists great husbands?

The older the wife the more they are into them

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What is the best way to embarrass an archeologists?

Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

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Two archeologists are taking a piss

Two archeologists are out taking a piss in a remote area when a snake hidden in the grass bites the first one on the tip of his cock.

Archeologist 1 : I got bitten on the tip of my cock by a snake with yellow and blue rings

Archeologist 2 : that sounds pretty bad and there is no hospit...

How do you know archeologists are lonely?

Theyre always coming up with new dating techniques.

Archeologists are good husbands/wives.

The older you are the more they get interested in you.

Do you know that most archeologists are women?

They are pretty good when it comes to dig things from the past.

Archeologists in Egypt have discovered a mummy covered in chocolate and hazelnuts.

They believe it to be Pharaoh Rocher.

TIL the american flag planted on the moon is now completely white due to radiation from the sun.

Great, now future archeologists are gonna think the French got there first.

Russian archeologists made a big discovery

As they dug a 100 meter deep hole, they found old copper wires. They made a big, worldwide announcement that the Russians were an advanced species. Even 1000 years ago they already had a copper network.

The Americans couldn't cope with the Russians being advanced longer than the Americans, so...

My son told me he wanted to be an archeologist

So I handed him the cat scoop and told him to find treasure in the cat box

What will archeologists 1000 years from now call GIFs?

Heirogifs

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Archeologists have reportedly uncovered the chamber pot of Jesus Christ

Holy shit, right?

Landed a job a few weeks ago as an archeologist excavating tombs in Egypt. But when I went in for work, they just had me go and recruit more archeologists.

Turns out it was a pyramid scheme

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Archeologists in South Africa have just discoved what they think is the oldest tampon ever found

They are trying to find out what period it came from

A Soviet archeology team is in Egypt on an expedition

They come across a pyramid and inside it is a mummy. Unfortunately, they can't determine who the mummy is. They get in touch with the NKVD who arrive a few hours later in the form of three hulking men carrying briefcases. The NKVD goons go inside the pyramid. After a few hours they come out.

...

A New tomb has been unearthed in Eqypt

Archeologists found a mummy wrapped in gold foil and knew they had found the tomb of Pharaoh Rocher

A recent archeological dig has uncovered a set of 2300 year old Roman gold rings, with a small golden figure of a Tick attatched to it, missing all its legs...

Archeologists originally believed it to be simple wear and tear, until it was discovered there were no signs of soldering on the bodies of the golden ticks, indicating they were intentionally made legless. A professor on the scene theorized that these rings were a gesture of romantic interest or a p...

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Cave Excavation

A team of American and British archaeologists was excavating in Israel when they came upon a cave. Written on the wall of the cave were the following symbols in their order of appearance:

1. a woman
2. a donkey
3. a shovel
4. a fish
5. a Star of David

They decided that this...

Old joke from former Eastern Germany: An archeology team was having trouble determining the age of human remains that they found deep in a cave, so they called in the best forensics teams from the CIA, KGB and the Stasi....

The CIA team goes in first with all their equipment and comes out about 4 hours later.

"As far as we can determine, the remains are about 500,000 years old."

Not to be outdone by the CIA, the KGB goes in and comes out about 8 hours later.

"The remains are approximately 515,550 y...

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Joe visits his favorite museum's new exhibit.

Joe was on his way to his favorite museum. The museum had announced a new exhibit and he was extremely excited to be one of the first people to ever see it, since he got some early access tickets. When he got there, there were about 12 other people who had also gotten a ticket for today, so he assum...

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