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Antarctica Jokes

Why are there no Covid-19 cases in Antarctica?

Because the people there are ice-o-lated

Why is it hard to make friends in Antarctica?

Because you can't break the ice.

I used to be an adventurer until I went to Antarctica

Thats when things went south

What did the explorer say when he spotted Antarctica?

I see land.

Did you hear about the failed mission to Antarctica?

Their journey went south.

What do you call kids in Antarctica?

Chilldren.

A scientists gets stationed in Antarctica...

The scientist was stationed at a moderately sized outpost, but unfortunately for him, he did not know anyone there.

Later that evening, he decided to hit up the only bar in the area, hoping to meet some of the fellow scientists and crew stationed there.

While he is sitting at the bar, ...

The Mechanic who worked in Antarctica.

A penguin is driving along one day and his car starts making this really strange sound. So, he pulls into the first gas station he sees, jumps out of his car, runs up to the mechanic and says: "I need for someone to look at my car! There's something wrong with it!"

1 The mechanic looks at him...

A Canadian couple takes their pet polar bear to Antarctica

Years ago, a couple in Canada found an abandoned polar bear cub and decided to adopt and raise it themselves. By the time the bear was grown up, it had become very tame, very friendly, and rather jovial.

Life with a pet polar bear turned out to be pretty fun, but one problem was that takin...

Why is Antarctica sad?

cuz it's iceolated....

No one in Antarctica has Covid 19

It's because they are Ice-O-Lated

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sex in Antarctica!!!

A man moved to an Antarctica village because of his new job. This village had many men, but no women. After a few days, the man started getting horny.
He asked his boss, "What do you guys do when you're horny here?"
The man told him, "We have a barrel with a hole in it. Here I'll show it to y...

Nobody in Antarctica has Covid-19

It’s because they’re ice-o lated

Who is married to Antarctica?

Uncle-Arctica

Did you hear about the people with Covid in Antarctica?

They're all in Ice-olation.

What do you call an infertility clinic in Antarctica?

Ice ice baby.

(with apolgies to the Van Winkle family)

No one in Antarctica has the Corona virus

Because they are so ice-o-lated


(actually seen this joke one of my buddies posted. Thought it was a good dad joke)

Why is Antarctica the least corrupt continent?

Because it has justice

Why do terrorists in Antarctica love being interrogated?

Snow boarding is fun as hell.

What do you call a bear that has been to Antarctica and the North Pole?

A bipolar bear

The Flat Earth Society held it's annual conference in Antarctica this year...

... but attendance fell off.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I got it all figured out. I will be a male stripper in Antarctica

My stage name? South Pole.

Iceberg

A couple icebergs in Antarctica are best friends. They grew up together and have known each other since they were ice cubes.

One iceberg decides he's tired of all the cold weather, he tells his best friend he's going on a warm vacation for a couple weeks. A couple weeks pass by and he returns...

Why is antarctica the smartest continent

Because only scientist live there

What’s the one problem that everyone from Asia, Africa, North America, South America, Antarctica, Europe, and Australia have in common?

Living within continents.

A zoologist explorer went to Antarctica....

A zoologist explorer went to Antarctica to study the penguins that live on Antarctica. When he arrived, he saw a group of penguins living together as a cluster. He then lined up 100 penguins so that he could ask them what do they do in their daily lives.

He asked the first penguin: " Hey pen...

What did the man say inside a simulation of Antarctica?

This is really code.

Did you guys hear about a terrorist group flying down south for a giant snowball fight against penguins

It was all over the news, the headlines read "Isis huge in Antarctica".

I played CS:GO in Antarctica

My computer kept freezing

What do you call a dad dead in Antarctica?

A Popsicle

I hope this virus doesn't spread to Antarctica...

I heard the local populous couldn't fly out of there even if they wanted to.

Building in Antarctica is difficult!

No matter what I tried I couldn't get my house to stay together. I tried concrete, brick and mortar, even duct tape! I finally found something that worked though, it was quite simple, igloo'd it together.

What did the terrorist group say when they went to Antarctica?

The ISIS everywhere

I heard that researchers in Antarctica have the worst, meanest personalities

They must be so cold

Speaking of Corona..

Why hasn't anyone in Antarctica died of Corona yet?

Because they are ICEolated.

A baby chick tells it's mom, "Mom I think I'm a penguin.."

"There's no way you're a penguin, you're without a doubt a baby chicken" she responds.

He insisted, "No mom, I really think I'm a penguin and I don't want to live in this farm anymore, I wanna live with my fellow penguins!"

She said "alright fine, you have an aunt that lives in Antarct...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three men run into a yeti...

Three men get stranded in Antarctica. While searching for a place to camp out, they run into a yeti. The yeti says "Each of you bring me a fruit or I'll kill you."

The first man comes back with strawberries and the yeti says "Shove them up your ass." He does so and begins crying.

The s...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a short Mexican researcher in Antarctica?

A Burrito

First joke I've ever come up with. My Hispanic wife laughed her butt off.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What does me during sex and Antarctica have in common?

Lack of wood...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A clitoris is a lot like Antarctica:

most men know it's there, but few really care.

Today, while googling something about insects...

i found out that the only continent lacking indigenous ants is ANTARCTICA.

Makes no sense at all :-)

Why can’t people in Antarctica get the corona virus?

Because they’re ice-olated.

My mother in law came down from the North of England to visit for Christmas...

...I told her "You should think about moving further South"

She was very touched until she realised I meant Antarctica

Yo mamma so fat…

For Halloween she put on a bedsheet and went as Antarctica.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Antarctic explorer has a sore ass from sitting on the ice all day.

Since there’s currently no doctor on base, he phones his doctor 5,000km away in Melbourne. The doctor says “it’s probably just piles, but since I can’t examine you, you’d better send a photo just in case it’s something more serious.”

Worried, the explorer blurts out “how the hell do I take a ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two penguins

Two penguins are chilling in Antarctica. One turns to the other and says, "Yo, it's really fucking cold." The other quickly looks at the penguin and exclaims, "Oh my god! You can talk!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There once was an evil queen...

This queen was a dreadful ruler, but it was primarily because, like superman, she was an extra terrestrial being practically immortal, and superior to the human race she conquered. She'd make continents(ignoring Antarctica) compete in building large sculptures of her and the last place sculpture wou...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A blonde wanted to hang a map up in her room and put pins in everywhere she had been

After buying the map, she went to Japan. Then she went to Alaska. Then Antarctica. Then Australia. She finally went home and picked up her map.

"Now I can finally hang it up," she said.

A kangaroo is jumping around in Australia

When ever she stops a little penguin pocks his head out of her pouch.

In Antarctica a little kangaroo is sitting with some penguins, sneezing and grumbling: Fucx this student exchange program!

I'm so sorry

What would you call the Islamic State if they tried to take over Antarctica?


Ice-is



I'll show myself out.

Where do dead penguins go? [long]

Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica – where do they go?
Wonder no more!!
It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives an extremely ordered and complex life. The penguin is very committed to its family and will mate for life,...

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