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Superglue Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My mate Paul said he superglued his as a dare once

I'm pretty sure he is full of

I think my wife has been putting superglue on my water gun collection.

She denies it but I'm sticking to my guns.

I just accidentally superglued my thumb and index finger together and at first, I started to panic but then I remembered that...

...it’s always going to be okay!

I accidentally gave my wife superglue instead of Chapstick

She's still not talking to me.

The other night I superglued my thumb and forefinger together...

Dont worry, everything is ok

I knew a girl who mixed up KY Jelly and superglue

I asked her how it happened but her lips were sealed

I gave my mother superglue instead of her lipstick.

She didn't even complain afterwards.

I first met my now-wife during an internship in a superglue factory, we were involved in a spill accident.

It was a real bonding experience.

I just poured superglue into a non-stick pan...

...someone is going to be wrong.

It's been three weeks since I put superglue on my friend's pen.

But he still can't let it go.

What's the difference between superglue, a tuna, and a piano?

You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish!

I've been reading the most interesting book on the history of superglue

I just can't put it down ......

My wife is still mad at me because I accidentally put superglue on her pen a few days ago.

She can’t seem to let it go.

Superglue comes with a warning: "Caution - Instantly bonds skin." But a whole shipment got out with a misprint: "Caution - Instantly bonds kin."

That's how I ended up marrying my first cousin.

I put a padlock on the refrigerator and superglued the key to the bottom of my big toe making it difficult to access the food.

I’m on the Key Toe Diet!

I left a tube of superglue in my pocket when I did laundry yesterday...

...it was a viscous cycle.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"Doctor, please prescribe the best medicine for covid-19"

"I'm prescribing Superglue. Apply it on your and sit at home."

I got my wife an amazing new lipstick that makes you lose weight.

It's called "Superglue".
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