Short Skirt Jokes - 38 Hilarious Short Skirt Jokes

A bakery owner hires a young female clerk who likes to wear very short skirts and thong panties.

One day a young man enters the store, glances at the clerk and at the loaves of bread behind the counter.

Noticing her short skirt, and the location of the raisin bread, he has a brilliant idea.

“I’d like some raisin bread please,” the man says.

The clerk nods and climbs up a la...

As I knelt down with a pair of size 4 shoes in front of this blonde in a short skirt, I couldn't resist a quick glance at her knickers:

"Hey cheeky!" She said as she gave me a playful kick. "I bet the only reason you work here is to look up girls' skirts isn't it?"

"That's an absolutely ridiculous accusation, madam." I said sternly. "I don't even work here."

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A man on a train is sitting across a gorgeous young lady, with tight short skirt on (NSFW)

She uncrosses her legs and he notices that she isn't wearing any panties. She saw him look, and says "Are you looking at my pussy?"
The man shamefully apologizes, and promises that it will not happen again.
"It's ok," she says, "I can make it do tricks. Look, I'll blow you a kiss"
The man w...

Great legs

The wife and I were in town shopping and as we came out of a store, three attractive young women aged between 18 and 20 walked by wearing tiny cropped tops and short short skirts. One of them, a tall blonde, had really fantastic long toned and tanned legs.I gently nudged my wife and said, "I bet you...

I was at the bus stop today

And a young blonde in a short skirt boarded the bus. She didn't have enough money for the fare, so she hitched up her skirt. The driver took one look and waved her on the bus.
The next day I thought I'd try the same. My bus came along. I got on and showed the driver a bit of leg.
He immediatel...

Today my girlfriend said she will spend the entire day wearing only a short skirt and a long jacket.

After all, it is my Cake day!

My daughter came downstairs in a short skirt.

I said, "You aren't wearing that to school."

"Why not?" she asked moodily.

I said, "Because I want your mother to try it on later."

A blonde in a short skirt is going up a flight of stairs

Behind her a man leans in to look under her skirt and smiles.

Outraged, the blonde yells "You sir, are no gentleman!"

Calmly, the man answers " And you madam, are not a blonde."

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My wife was wearing a short skirt as she stood at the top of a Christmas tree...

My wife was standing on a set of steps wearing a short skirt as she placed the star at the top of the Christmas tree.

I couldn't resist, I shoved my head up, slipped her pants to the side and gave her fanny a right good licking.

Everyone else in the ...

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I was at the grocery store with my gpa when a couple girls in super short skirts walked by....

Gpa said, looks at those jet skirts, as we both admired the two ladies. I had to know, what's a jet skirt? Gpa replied, it's a skirt so short that when they bend over you can see the cockpit.

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George and Harriet decided to celebrate their 25th Wedding Anniversary with a trip to Las Vegas

When they entered the hotel/casino and registered, a sweet young woman dressed in a very short skirt became very friendly. George brushed her off. Harriet objected, "George, that young woman was nice, and you were so rude."

"Harriet, she's a prostitute."

"I don't believe you. That swee...

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nsfw Wife's New Panties

A frustrated wife buys a pair of crotchless panties in an attempt to spice up her dead sex life. She puts them on, along with a short skirt and sets on the sofa opposite her husband. At certain moments during the game, she would uncross her legs, just long enough for her husband to see. Finally afte...

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Me: Mom, I’m headed downtown with my friends.

Mom: Not in that short skirt you’re not!

Me: Come on mom! Why not?

Mom: Because I can see your balls James!

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Bartering Australian style

This morning I was in luck and was able to buy two boxes of VB beer cheap at the local supermarket.

I placed the boxes on the front seat and headed back home.
I stopped at a service station where a drop-dead gorgeous blonde in a short skirt was filling up her car at the next pump.

S...

A beautiful female student was in danger of flunking her middle-aged male professor's course

It was near the end of the semester and she came to class in a short skirt and low-cut top. After the other students left the classroom she approached the prof.

"You know, I'd do *anything* to pass this class," she said flirtatiously.

The professor lowered his voice and looked down his...

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TIFU by not wanting to get a boner

Obligatory this happened yesterday.

So I was sitting on the train in front of this beautiful Thai girl. Nice cleavage, short skirt and the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen in my life.

I started feeling blood rushing to my man parts, as I was praying "please don't get a boner, please ...

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This hot weather...

The thing I love most about this hot weather is the crop tops and short skirts...

Although it does make me look a bit gay.

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Two old men meet every morning on a park bench after religious services.

One day one of the old men shows up with a black eye.

The other guy says “What happened”

He says “ I was at mass, and a beautiful young woman was in the pew in front of me. About halfway through, I noticed her short skirt had gotten wedged in between her ass cheeks. After a while, I c...

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Three couples are trying to join a very conservative church

After going through all of the night classes, Bible lectures, and vows, the minister says they have one final test: they must abstain from relations for one week. All of them agree and go on their way.

When they return, the minister asks them how they did.

The first couple is in their...

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A taxi driver goes home after a very long shift.

On his way home he sees a very drunk man that can’t even stay on his feet. “Can’t let that poor guy go home alona like this” he puts him in the passenger sit, asks him where he lives and starts driving to his house while the drunk guy sleeps. On their way there the taxi driver sees a women who’s hot...

An old man goes into a restaurant...

An old man goes into a restaurant and is seated. All the waitresses are gorgeous. A particularly voluptuous waitress wearing a very short skirt and legs that won’t quit walks up to his table and asks if he is ready to order.

"What would you like, sir?”

He looks at the menu, scans her...

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Destination Pittsburgh

Three priests were heading to Pittsburgh. The youngest priest, knowing he was most connected to the secular world, offered to get the tickets.

Upon arriving at the counter, the noticed the cashier was wearing a low low top and a short short skirt. His heart fluttered a moment...

“Yes ...

3 generations of males went to an old-fashioned store...

The young man asked for a pound of raisins from the pretty lady behind the counter. She had to climb a ladder to fill the order, revealing her naked flesh under her short skirt. Then, she asked his dad what he wanted.

Wanting to see a panty-less beauty climb the stairs again, he too asked f...

An old man and a young man bump into each other at the grocery store

They each say excuse me and the young man says "I'm sorry I bumped into you, it's just that I'm looking for my wife. I lost her somewhere in another asile."

The old man says I am also looking for my wife. Let's help each other. Tell me what does your wife look like?

The young man repli...

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A special talking koala was making his way from Australia to New York.

He wandered down a back alley one day and saw a sexy lady in heels and a short skirt smoking a cigarette.

She was shocked when he asked her for one of her cigarettes. "Omg you can talk?"

After talking she invited him inside and before she knew it he was up her skirt and performed cunni...

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A cowboy is sitting in a bar having a whiskey

Before too long, a young, attractive blonde in a short skirt walks in and takes a seat up next to him at the bar. He offers to buy her a drink, so she asks for a martini.

They talk for a short while and hit it off fairly well. As the blonde finishes her martini and goes to eat the ol...

I saw a girl busking today.

She had a great voice and an even better pair of legs, emphasised by the short skirt she was wearing.
"Any requests?" She asked the watching crowd.
"Your thong," I replied with a wink.
Everyone gasped in horror, and the girl slapped me.
It's tough being an Elton John fan with a lisp.

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Picked up this woman last night

big tits, curvy arse, amazing legs, short skirt. She was a little bit out of it ... But one thing led to another and we ended up having mind-blowing sex. I’ve now been sacked as an ambulance driver

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A guy applies for their driving license

Before starting practicing, of course, they had to pass a theoretical test.

The teacher asks them: «You're on the road at night, and you see 2 lights. What is it?»

And the student answers: «It's a car».

The teacher says: «It narrows down too little. Is it a BMW? A Mercedes? A Fo...

An old man Goes Into a Bakery...

The girl behind the counter is wearing a very short skirt. A customer orders raisin bread, which means she has to grab a little step ladder and grab the loaf off the highest shelf. As she's going up the ladder, all the guys in the store realize they can now see up her skirt. So they all line up and ...

On the train

I was sitting on the train this morning when a hot looking woman walked into the carriage in a tight, short skirt and a low cut top. As she sat down in the seat opposite me. I sat there thinking "Please don't get an erection, please don't get an erection"

Then she did.

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Wetherspoons Uxbridge

A Group of blokes, all aged 40, discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons in Uxbridge because the barstaff had big breasts and wore short skirts.

Ten years later, at age 50, the friends once again discussed where
they should meet...

Raisin Bread

An old man walks into a bakery owned by a beautiful young lady that is known for wearing short skirts. He asks the lady for a loaf of raisin bread on the top shelf so that he can take a look up her skirt. Another man walks in and also asks for raisin bread to sneak a peak. A third man walks in and t...

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A man went shopping with his wife.

At some point he lost his wife so he continued alone and searched for his wife. Suddenly he runs his shopping cart into the cart of another guy.

"Oh, I'm sorry sir," says the man.
"I wasn't paying attention for a moment, since I have lost my wife and I'm searching for her."

"Wel...

Two old guys in a supermarket wandering about, looking lost...

One says to the other "Lost the other half?"

"Yup" he replies.

"Me too. Let's join forces to find them. What does yours look like?"

"She's 25, six foot blonde, 36 double-D, long boots and a short skirt".

"Good. We'll look for yours first".

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Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of new space and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all ot...

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My girlfriends hot sister

A man who was very close to proposing to his girlfriend was on his way from work when he received a phone call from his girlfriend.
“Hey honey can you please meet at my sisters place for dinner tonight”?

The man agreed and drove over to his girlfriends sisters house. Now this wasn’t out o...

Two men are standing in line at a bakery when an old man joins them.

There's a cute young woman behind the counter when the first man tells her his order.

'I'll have a loaf of sour dough and how about some raisin bread.'

At this point the second man in line looks back at the old man and tells him to watch. The old man then sees the lady behind the count...

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