Y'all ever heard of reverse exorcism?

It's when the devil tells the priest to exit the child's body

How does a priest perform an exorcism in Texas?

"Gwan git!"

What's the definition of a reverse exorcism?

It's when you ask the Devil to get the priest out of your little boy

So my brother got an exorcism

Went fine until he fell arrears on the payments and got repossessed

I had to get a loan to pay for an Exorcism

They said if i didn't pay it back on time i'd be repossessed

What's reverse exorcism?

When a demon commands a priest to leave the body of a child

Do you know what is reversed exorcism

When satan tells a priest to get out of a kid

I couldn’t afford to pay the priest who carried out my exorcism.

He repossessed my home.

Have you heard of the Irish exorcism that happened recently?

The demon had to pull the priest out of the little boy.

Woman could not afford to pay her exorcism bills.

Her soul got repossessed...

What's the easiest way to perform an exorcism?

You beat the hell out of them

Exorcism

Whats the difference between a normal exorcism and an Irish exorcism??
A normal exorcism you call the priest up to banish the demon out of the child.
An Irish exorcism you call the demon to banish the priest out of the child... :D

Always be sure to pay the Priest who performs the exorcism on your property.

Or they'll come back and re-possess your house.

A man goes to see his priest.

Father, my life is terrible, I have so many problems.

The priest tells him that he needs an exorcism to cast the devil out of his life.

Can't do that father, I have 3 chidren with her.

My house got repossessed

I feel like all the money I spent on the exorcism was wasted

A woman just moved into a new house and thinks it's haunted, so she goes to talk to a priest.

The priest talks her through the exorcism process and tells her what to expect. The woman says, "I don't know if that will work. You see, the ghost in my house is rather *unusual.*"

"*Unusual* how?" the priest asks.

"I have reason to believe that this ghost is... a huge pervert." ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A peasant was arguing with his wife...

... when, in a fit of rage, he threw her down the well.

A week later, he goes back to the well, hoping she got calmed, and he thew down a ladder in the well.

The only thing, it's the devil who got out, and thanked the peasant.

-- Gosh, thanks! It was getting unbearable with her ...

Possession is nine tenths of the law.

The remaining tenth is exorcism.

A daughter is seemingly possessed by a demon...

Her mother frantically calls their priest, requesting an exorcism. She describes the details "She has been spinning about wildly, climbing on the walls, running on the ceiling.. moving about non-stop!" The priest replies "I don't know what you want me to do. Sounds like she's already exercising plen...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.