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Spiritualist Jokes

A dwarf spiritualist broke out of prison today.

Police say there is a small medium at large.

A spiritualist who’d recently been widowed met a colleague and reported excitedly…..

she'd just received a message from her dead husband - asking her to send him a pack of cigarettes.
"The only thing is," she mused, "that I don't know where to send them."
"Why not?" asked her friend.
"Well, he didn't actually say that he was in Heaven - but I can't imagine he'd be in Hell."...

I was at a seance and the spiritualist kept giggling, so I punched him.

My mother always told me to strike a happy medium.

Try to buy some clothes from a spiritualist shop today.

Turns out they could only offer mediums.

When I went to pay for my items in a spiritualist shop I noticed a sign saying 'Queue on the other side'.

So I killed myself.

Last night I was walking home and decided to take a shortcut past the cemetery…

When a group of spiritualists walked up to me and explained that they were too afraid to walk past the cemetery at night, so I agreed to let them walk along with me.Then I told them “I understand, I also used to be freaked out too when I was alive”.

I’ve never seen anyone run that fast!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sex with ghosts

A spiritualist meeting, and the leader asks the crowd, "Who here believes in ghosts?" Most of the hands go up. "Has anyone here seen a ghost?" Fewer hands go up. "Heard a ghost?" "Smelled a ghost?" "Touched a ghost?" Fewer hands go up each time. Finally, he asks "Has anyone here ever had sex...

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