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Postage Jokes

When an unpopular President completed his presidency, he wanted a special postage stamp issued with his picture on it.

He stressed that it should be of international quality. The stamps were duly released and the former President was pleased. But within a couple of days of the release of the stamp, he began hearing complaints that the stamp was not sticking properly, and he was furious. So he ordered an investigatio...

Have you heard the one about the letter with no postage?

You wouldn't get it.

US Postal Service was considering a new Trump postage stamp...

But in the early focus-group testing, most people were spitting on the wrong side causing the stamp not to stick to the envelopes.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call it when you cover your in postage stamps?

Junk mail.

(Credit to one if my FB friends)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Warning to all men about eBay.

Be careful what you buy on eBay.

If you buy stuff on line, be sure to

check out the seller carefully.

I just spent £95 + postage,

on a enlarger.

Bastards sent me a magnifying glass.

The only instructions said, "Do not use in sunlight."

I hate hostage negotiations, where you have to prove you're a trusted identity, and you have to meet up at some out-of-the-way location.

Sorry, I meant postage negotiations.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yesterday I sent a pic to everyone in my address book

Not only was it embarrassing, it cost a fortune in postage.

What's the biggest drawback to voting by mail?

Postage from Russia will cost a fortune!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was so pissed off when I had to buy a $400 plane ticket for my child.

The craigslist ad said the price included postage.

what travels around the world but stays in one corner?

postage stamp

What kind of tattoo does a Postal Service worker get?

A tramp stamp, and it says, "No postage necessary if nailed in the US."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy buys a chihuahua guard dog....

After a high spike in the local crime rate, a guy decided it was time to buy a dog to protect his home and family. Wanting a trained guard dog, he went to the local training school.

He tells the salesman he is looking for a good guard dog, but his house isn't that big and he has a postage s...

Why did the letter arrive wet?

Because it had postage dew.
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