Pane Jokes - 50 Hilarious Pane Jokes

Why did the glass pane start a fight?

Because it was tempered.

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I had sex with a window last night

It was a pane in the ass

Last year I replaced several windows in my house and they were the expensive double-pane energy efficient kind.

But this week I got a call from the contractor complaining that his work has been completed for a whole year and I had yet to pay for them.

Boy oh boy did we go 'round. Just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am automatically stupid. So, I proceeded to tell him just what his fast talking ...

I once met a window cleaner…

He said he loves his job, but couldn’t stand the pane.

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Did you hear about the man who installed a window in his butt?

It was a pane in the ass.

My house was so windy it blew my window open and I struggled to get it to close

It was a huge pane

I hate when revolving doors move too fast

It's a pane in the ass

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I'm pissed. The window on my house FELL OFF onto my front lawn!

It's a pane in the grass.

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I asked my wife "If I was an inanimate object, what would I be?"

She said "a window"

I thought about it for a minute and then said "Is that because I'm transparent, I let the sunshine into your life and shield you from the rain?"

She looked up slowly, smiled and said "No it's because you're a fucking pane"

My stupid, hungry donkey decided to eat a window

It was a huge pane in the ass

I thought breaking glass would be easy.

Turns out, it's a real pane.

How do you get rid of a headache?

Put your head through a window and the pane will disappear.

I submitted a glass pane in for a competition.

I'm hoping I can window.

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Never try to shove a piece of a window up your ass.

Its a real pane

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Amish man and his son go to a big shopping mall for the first time

They're staring in wonder at all of the shiny big buildings and the massive panes of glass when the two come across two big shiny metal doors.

"What is it, dad?" asked the son.

"I have no idea." replied the father. I have never seen anything like this in all my life.

They watch...

I Have Had plenty of Experiences with Defenestration.

It's never pane-less, unfortunately.

I saw a fly fly into a window today

All it felt was pane

Why doesn't Jesus like having the image of his crucifixion on church windows?

He's in too much *pane*.

I walked into my glass door today

Oh the pane...

I fell through a window once...

It was quite the pane-ful experience

Some punk kids threw a baseball through the lower half of my window, and then jumped through an entire other window to get it!

Let me tell you, it was a pane and a half to replace.

Why is a broken window so frustrating?

Because it’s a pane to replace.

What do window washers, who are high on really good weed, deal with every day?

Chronic pane

Don't feel bad if you break a window...

you're putting it out of it's pane.

My pet viper swallowed a sheet of window glass causing the snake severe physical discomfort.

It was a real pane in the asp.

No one wants to carry large windows around

It's a pane in the glass

There’s nothing worse than a broken window

It’s always a pane to fix

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2 shifts at the window factory

No bathroom brakes.
It was a pane in the glass.

It took over a month to install our floor-to-ceiling windows.

It was a big pane.

What happens when a glassblower touches the glass while it’s still hot?

They feel pane.

My friend got hit with a window installment falling on his lower back the other day

Said it was a huge pane in the ass

I smashed a sheet of glass on the floor and I can't find the last piece....

It's a bit of a pane.

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Why don't people put pieces of glass up their buttholes?

Because it's a pane in the ass.

A man goes to see a doctor about a gas problem he's been having for awhile.

The Doctor's office is in the old market section of town and the man is impressed with the old marble walls, bronze accents and the tall, paned windows with hinged transom windows above them.

The doctor asks, "what's the trouble"?

The man say, "Well, I have this frrrrt gas problem. I ...

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The other day, I got thrown through a window with no glass.

It was pane-less.

What did the emo window say?

Life is pane.

What kinds of windows does 2 chains own?

TWO PANES.

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When people use the wrong homonyms it irritates me

I know the pane, I've been their before.

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I asked my friend about their new glass dildo

Apparently it's a pane in the ass

If a man crashes through a window and severely injures himself...

...Would you say that he's in *pane*?

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You don't want to fall ass first into a window

It would be a pane in the ass

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One of the jokes I remember a friend telling me when I was a kid.

So there's this guy who can never say anything right.

He goes to the pet store with the intention of buying a Cocker Spaniel, but when he walks up to the store clerk, he says "Do you have a cock for sale?"

The woman says, "I'm sure you mean a Cocker Spaniel sir." And she hands him a ...

A Good Man

A good man spends his life doing good deeds. One day he was flying back from Africa when his pane crashes near an uncharted island. He survives but is captured by cannibals.

The cannibals are prepping to cook him when he warns them.

"If you eat me, you guys are gonna feel sick and th...

Interesting Title Here

Pun time!!

Q: What do you call dental x-rays? A: Tooth pics.

Q: What do you call a group of babies? A: An infantry.

Q: Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? A: He pasta away.

Q: Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? A: Because they lactose.

Q: What do yo...

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Three nuns are remodeling their church...

New window panes, interior paint, new pews, the works. When it comes time to paint, they decide they don't want to get any paint on their habits, so they take off their clothes. They're painting half-nude and suddenly they hear a knock on the door. Flustered, Sister Elizabeth asks, "Who is it?"
...

Why did everyone hate the window?

He was a pane in the glass!

Credit: 12 year old me

A guy and his pet window walk into a bar

After a few drinks the two decide to leave. But before they head out the bartender reminds them that they still have to pay. So the guy stuffs 20 bucks in the window sill and the bartender scoffs and says: "What, is the window pane?"

What do you call a window that can rap?

Two Panes

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Three Chinese Tortures

One day, a man was lost walking through a dense forest. When it was getting dark he came across a secluded cabin in a clearing on top of a hill. He knocked on the door, and an ancient looking Chinese man answered the door.
“Please sir”, the man plead. “It is getting dark, and I’m lost. Could you ...

[long] My company is locked down and I am required to work from home

I'm used to working in an open office space so this is a huge change for me. In order to make the transition as easy as possible, I have prepared my home office so remind me of work.

* I've purchased a piece of Limburger cheese and placed it on a plate in the middle of the room to remind me o...

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