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Pales Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Wales could've been called Pales.

Then Pales, England,Northern Ireland, Scotland would've been penis together.

A woman dies and goes to the afterlife. They tell her:

\- You were a righteous woman in your life. You may go to Heaven, here is the queue.

She joins the queue, starts waiting... suddenly, she hears a horrible scream.

\- What was that? - she asks a nearby angel.

\- Well, a new soul is being converted into an angel, so they drill ho...

Today I learned the fame of Albert Einstein pales in comparison to his brother whose work in cellular regeneration has been the subject of many books and several movies.

His name was Frank.

A new poll says 69% of Americans support Medicare-for-All...

...which pales in comparison to the 100% of Americans who support “69 for All”

A restaurant in Heaven is serving a Christmas special. . .

One day, on Christmas, a restaurant in Heaven is having an extravagant, 3-course Christmas special.

“For our first course,” announces the head chef, “We’ll be serving the food you most commonly ate during your time on Earth!”

So, the waiters bring out everyone’s food. Some people get ...

There's a guy who is in love with a girl, and one day, he sees her and decided to talk to her.

Girl: What?
Guy: You are so pretty, the sun pales in comparison.
Girl: Don't say that, that's not true.
Guy: I love you, and I heard that you loved me back.
Girl: Yes, that should be obvious.
Guy: Is there anything I have to do?
Girl: No, of course not!
Guy: Is my ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Cake day joke: toughest cowboys

First cowboy says, "I'm the toughest sumbitch in these here parts. Yesterday I grabbed me the meanest bull and threw his ass down, balls and all, with my left hand into this here dirt. Pinned him fer 25 seconds without breaking a sweat."

The second cowboy looks up from the fire. "Impressive, ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman walked into a pharmacy and asks

"Can you sell me some cyanide?"

The pharmacist asks what it's going to be used for.

"I need to kill my husband."

"Sorry, I can't sell it to you."

The woman pulls out a picture of her husband sleeping with the pharmacist's wife.

The pharmacist immediately pales and ...

Man on the mountain

One day on a nearby mountain a man stood atop it. He looked at the view and turned his pockets inside out. Powdered gold gushed out at amazing speed as he stood there.

Soon the media caught wind of this and went to investigate. After stuffing as many buckets of gold into their van as they cou...

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