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Two men are walking on the sidewalk.

One of the two men stops the other.

-Be careful ! There is dog shit right there.

-You’re wrong, it is not shit.

-Yes it is.

-No it’s not ! You know what ? I’m going to prove it.

The man sticks his finger in the brownish thing and licks it.

-Oh you were right...

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Jim is in a bar men's room finishing having a pee. He zips up and washes his hand and is about to leave when he sees a man with no arms by the door.

"Hey mate, can you help me out here?" the no armed man says.

Jim grimaces but decides to help the man out. They walk over to a urinal and Jim unzips the man's pants. "Yeah, just take the old boy out for me, will you?" the man says.

Jim pulls the man's underwear down revealing the no ...

One day in class, the teacher brought a bag...

"Now class, I'm going to reach into the bag and describe something, and you tell what I'm talking about. Okay, first: it's round, plump and red."

Of course, Johnny raised his hand high, but the teacher, wisely ignored him and picked Deborah, who promptly answered "An apple." The teacher repli...

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Uranus ( long )

Originally from Buck Buchanan 9 i just had to share) let the Uranus jokes come forth.............anyway....

“It's my understanding that the first six probes were recklessly plunged into Uranus at such excessively high speeds these early attempts only produced massively dense clouds of methane...

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Two Russians were walking through the woods...

And they came across a pile of brownish muck.
"Look like dogshit?" asks Commander Igor.
"Ya! Look like dogshit!" answers Ivan.
"Smell it!" commands Igor. Ivan gets down and takes a whiff.
"Smell like dogshit?" asks Igor.
"Ya! Smells like dogshit!"
"Taste i...

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A new doctor in town

A little long but funny:

So a new doctor moved to some town and put up this sign on his clinic, "Guaranteed to fix any medical problem you have". So one of the douchebags in that town bet his friends that he can come up with something that the doctor will never be able to fix. So, the next d...

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