UPJOKE
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Kiddie Jokes

I'm not sure churches are the best places for PokèStops...

a priest just asked me in and offered me a Slowpoke

Why did the kiddie pool have no friends?

Because it was too shallow.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call someone’s belly button when you shoot a load into it?

A kiddie pool

What did the Olympic size swimming pool say to the kiddie pool?

I can't be your friend anymore you're just too shallow!

George Bush goes to a primary school

George Bush goes to a primary school to talk about the war. After his talk, he offers question time.

One little boy puts up his hand and George asked, What is your name?

Bob

And what is your question, Bob?

I have 3 questions.

First, why did the USA invade Iraq with...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three Irishmen are walking home after a night at the pub.

They're all a bit pissed, and decided to take the shortcut through the churchyard. As they pass the gravestones, one Irishman says to the others, "Look at this, boys. Ol' Patrick Flannigan lived 'til 85". Another of the men says, "Ah, that's nothing. Davie O'Toole is buried here. He lived to be 97."...

Hillary Clinton goes t o a gifted-student primary school in New York to talk about the world. After her talk she offers question time.

One little boy puts up his hand. Hillary asks him what his name is. "Kenneth," he says
And what is your question, Kenneth?" she asks.

I have three questions," he says.

"1st -- whatever happened in Benghazi?

2nd -- why would you run for president if you are not capable of ...

I went spearfishing for the first time the other day, it was great...

...the faces of the parents at the kiddie pool were much better though.

I'm planning on opening a store that sells string instruments for children.

I'm calling it 'Kiddie Fiddlers'.

First day of school

It was the first day of school, and the elementary school teacher was establishing the fact that she'd take no nonsense from the kiddies this year.
While taking the roll, she was told by one boy, "My name is Johnny Fuchauer." (F\*ck-hour)
So she said, "There'll be none of that kind of thin...

This Day in History, 1978

This day in history, June 12,1978, there was a large amount of [Basques](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Basque_Country_(autonomous_community) who died in a fire at an old local theater. The theater was packed full, and as the fire erupted the entire building's occupants flooded to the only exit in th...

What do you call a professional violinist when they're young?

A kiddie fiddler.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Ho Ho Ho

In the spirit of the upcoming Holiday I would like to share a story my Father told me when I was a boy. He sat me on his knee and said:

Long ago on a snowy Christmas Eve Santa was out delivering toys to all the good kiddies. Like the many before this one it was all work, curdled milk and lame...

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