... when I suddenly remembered that since I had the SUV today, I was stuck with dropping our Great Dane off at the vets that morning. A screeching u-turn, more than a few rolling stops and made it back in record time. Bursting into the house, I tore from room to room, calling for the dog. Throwing ...
Half my humor is puns, the other half is memes.
The third half is absurdity.
How many existentialists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. One to screw it in and one to observe how the lightbulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
My Irish stepfather was a master story teller. He told the Wembley joke differently than what I've seen online.
Excuse me, is this Wembley? No it's Thursday. So am I let's have one.
He paid particular attention to the beat changes in this story. At the end of each line (the beat) he would change voices. Each line was a different voice/character. He told the story as if it was a fast paced con...
One Sunday a military chaplain was giving a sermon on service members misuse of the word “hell” in every day life.
With fire and brimstone vigor he expostulated on the absurdity of expressions such as: “What the hell do you want?” “Get the hell over here!” “Where the hell have you been?!” and many others.
As always he greeted his parishioners as they exited the chapel and sure enough, a crusty old Mari...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
The Challenge [NSFW]
A man walks into a bar, reaching the counter a sign hangs above the bar stating, “Complete The Challenge and Win Free Alcohol for Life!” Intrigued by this the man asks the bartender what exactly is the challenge. “Well first off you have to drink a gallon of apple cider vinegar, second we keep a gat...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Cunning old bitch
So there was an old lady who entered the First National Bank of Perth one day with a big suit case. She approached the front counter.
"I'd like to speak to the manager please" she asked.
The cashier attempted to help her but she insisted. So the cashier went and got the manager. ...
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