This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A wife woke up one morning after a long restful sleep......

She stretches, and turns to her husband and says, “you know, I had the weirdest dream! I dreamt that you gave me a diamond necklace! What do you think my dream means?”
The husband thoughtfully responds “well, you’ll know tonight!”
Later that evening, the husband comes home with a tiny packag...

After years of research and exploration, an Archaeologist discovered an ancient book...

The book was said to answer any question asked of it. Being a professional, the archaeologist took the book back to his prestigious university, which was home to several leaders of certain fields. To research the book's power in a controlled manner, the archaeologist rounds up three of the universit...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I got told off for masturbating at the gun range.

We had very different interpretations of shooting from the hip.

What's the difference between astronauts and people with suicidal tendencies?

Their interpretations of the phrase, "good bye world".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Cave Excavation

A team of American and British archaeologists was excavating in Israel when they came upon a cave. Written on the wall of the cave were the following symbols in their order of appearance:

1. a woman
2. a donkey
3. a shovel
4. a fish
5. a Star of David

They decided that this...

Two recent philosophy graduates..

2 recent philosophy graduates, John and Andy, embarked on a cross-country journey to better understand the meaning of life.

They took with them their best friend, Bill, who was a college drop-out and a former drug addict who's now sober and helping his dad's business.

John and Andy tho...

Please settle an argument regarding this joke: why is it funny?

>What is the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?

>30 pounds.

This joke has been the source of debate among my peers. I know I'm right, but I need evidence/validation. Why is this joke funny? What is the punch line implying?

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EDIT: Thanks for the response...

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