Everyone is talking about how the inaugural attendance was 1/40 of what it was in 2009...

They don't understand how killer the commute from Moscow is.

What did the inaugural ribbon for the new hotel say before being cut?

Cut my life into pieces, this is my last resort

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When Obama made his inaugural speech, they put him behind bulletproof glass.

And that's proof of the racism that still exists in America today. I mean, just because he's black, doesn't mean he was going to go and shoot everybody.

Why was William Henry Harrison's inaugural address so memorable?

He had a killer final draft.

I'm going to the inaugural meeting of the Dodgem Car Appreciation Society later.

They're expecting a bumper crowd.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I waited a long time for my testicles to descend

When one finally did I had an inaugural ball

My friend Larry says he knows everyone...

During President Obama’s inauguration, Larry told me, "You know, Obama and I are buddies." said, "Sure you are." He said, "No, really! Just turn on your TV tonight to the Inaugural Ball. You'll see me." Sure enough, I turned on the TV that night, and there was Larry, talking to President Obama w...

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