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Horsepower Jokes

What do you call a loaf of bread with 1500 horsepower?

A Baguetti

Apparently if you leave your car parked overnight on the highway the next morning it sounds like you have more horsepower.

Nevermind turns out my catalytic converter got stolen.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So I’m from Montana

A person asked me:
“Do you still ride a horse to work?”
To which I replied:
“Of course not! I traded it in for a mule; I lost horsepower, I make it up in ass mileage.”

How fast is a pregnant horse?

2 Horsepower

Pregnant horses would be excellent in a race

They have twice the horsepower

What kind of horse is the fastest?

>! A pregnant one, because it has 2 horsepower !<

Husband: I lost my wife, she went shopping and hasn't come back yet

Inspector: What is her height?

Husband: I never checked....

Inspector: Slim or healthy?

Husband: Not slim, can be healthy....

Inspector: Colour of her eyes?

Husband: Never noticed.....

Inspector: Colour of hair?

Husband: Not sure, changes with seasons...

Why didn't motorcycle cop catch the cowboy?

Well,

The cowboy had some real horsepower and the cop was "too tired".

So my wife went missing. I went to the police to report her disappearance...

The policeman asked “What is she wearing?”
I replied “I don’t recall”.
The policeman asked “What is her height?”
I replied “Average”.
The policeman asked “Weight?”
I replied “Who knows?”
The policeman asked “Hair colour?”
I replied “Mmm what month ar...

Harley

The quickest way to turn gasoline into noise without the side effect of horsepower

hellcat and the mx-5

A Dodge Challenger Hellcat is roaring through the mountains when little mx-5 catches up to it. The Hellcat pushes harder, hard on the gas on the straights, hard on the brakes before the turns. But no matter what the Hellcat does, the mx-5 is still right on the Hellcat.



Finally the Hel...

Stinky smell in the car ...

-Sir.. how many horsepower is your car?
- 120 horses
- I am afraid that one of them is Dead.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The local hot shot had never lost a drag race.

He had a souped up little dragster he pieced together himself. It was an old Honda, sure, but this guy had tuned it to perfection. Not only that, he'd squeezed every ounce of horsepower out of it possible: straight pipes, turbo, the works.

There's a straightaway on a back road where all the l...

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