UPJOKE
discriminationlgbthate crimediscriminatoryfeartransgenderphobiaprejudicesatanismnon-heterosexualmisogynisticbigotedhatefulxenophobicderogatory

Homophobic Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My priest is surprisingly homophobic...

...for a man who spends his nights on his knees, begging for another man to come for a second time.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is a homophobic child's worst nightmare?

A monster coming out of the closet!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A homophobic guy walks into a bar and immediately orders 3 double shots of whiskey.

Bartender: "Wow, that's a hefty order."
Guy: "Yeah, I just got terrible news that my brother has turned gay..."
Bartender gives the guy his 3 shots and leaves him alone.

-Next day-
The same guy enters the bar and again, orders the same drinks.
Bartender: "Still not over ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I’m not homophobic or anything but...

Gays are a pain in the ass

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm so homophobic,

I eat my hotdogs sideways.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm homophobic the same way in arachnophobic..

I don't hate spiders or homosexuals but id still scream if I seen one in the bath.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just found out my wife is homophobic.

You should have seen how mean she was when I introduced her to my boyfriend…

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

America is so racist and homophobic

That people even want their teeth to be straight and white.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Whenever I see a man wearing a skirt, I run away.

It’s not that I’m homophobic, I’m just afraid he’ll start to play the bagpipes.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Homophobics in my apartment building have been boycotting the elevators.

They found out elevators go both ways.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I've never understood why homophobics wore clothes

because clothes come out of the closet and that's gay

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My art teacher has been rather homophobic lately...

She wants everything to be straight

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I feel sorry for homophobic people

Imagine being scared of your own home

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do people in the Middle-East tend to be homophobic?

They have had bad experiences with mandates.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A black Christian man and a white Jewish man walk into a bar...

"That's racist!"

Okay, so a Christian man and a Jewish man walk into a bar...

"That's religionist!"

Okay, so two men walk into a bar...

"That's sexist!"

Okay, so a man and a woman walk into a bar...

"That's homophobic!"

Okay, so two people walk into a...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I know how to defeat Thanos

We need to pull up his homophobic tweets from 2009.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

American conservatives are pretty homophobic

for people so proud of their four fathers

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What starts with G, ends with Y, and is something you really wouldn't want your son to be?

Grumpy, you homophobic fucks.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm beginning to think my girlfriend might be homophobic...

She reacted *very poorly* last night when I came out to her...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Define Homophobic

having or showing a dislike of or prejudice against homophones and homonyms

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a homophobic hobo?

Homoless

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear about the homophobic firefighter?

He only put out camp fires.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Princess of Potatoes has to marry

King Tater instructs his daughter to choose a noble potato to wed.

The princess says, "Father, I have chosen. I want to marry Rachel Maddow."

"I WON'T HAVE IT!" yells King Tater in a fury.

"But Father, I never knew you would be homophobic," said the princess.

"It's not ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In the South, we value diversity.

We want you to feel included, whether you're homophobic, Islamophobic, or just a racist.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My mum asked, "Are you homophobic?"

I said, "No I'm not afraid of my house."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I think I might be homophobic..

... every time my boyfriend cums on my back, it just slides right off!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I used to think I was homophobic.

It turns out that I was just afraid of monsters in the closet.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

As a homophobic, racist paedophile I can safely say...

Nothing.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is white and hurts a homophobic man if it lands on him?

An airplane

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I came out to my dad, he was surprisingly supportive!

He's not homophobic or anything, it's just the closest he's ever come to child support.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I hate disappointing people in general. So instead of telling my boss I’m gonna quit...

I’ve been tweeting homophobic and racist epithets for 8 months now, but sadly I’m still here.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old grandma is taking care of her grandson for the summer before he leaves for college...

One day, the boy brings a male friend home, seeming to be very secretive about their activities, but the grandmother doesn't think much of it.

She understands why they are secretive; her son and daughter-in-law are peculiarly homophobic. She doesn't agree with that and wishes to tell her gran...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Cuban, a Canadian, and a homophobic walk into a bar

The bartender says, "What'll it be, Senator Cruz?"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So a vegan crossfitter and a homophobic priest simultaneously walk in to a bar..

Then they both went to the hospital for head wounds.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I've seen a LGBT activist publish phones and home addresses of homophobic straight people on the Internet.

Needless to say, I found his approach somewhat heterodox.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Trump and Pence are so homophobic ...

... they couldn't get a mandate.

HAHAHA! A lot of people are going to die in the next 4 years.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because he's homophobic.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It must be hard being homophobic

Imagine being terrified of the place where you live?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How many homophobic people does it take to change a lightbulb?

It doesn't matter, they are scared off change even if it makes the world a bit brighter.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.