This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I called in sick to work. Told them I have anal glaucoma.

When they asked what that was, I explained I just couldn’t see my ass going into work today.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Told my boss I had to stay home today because I have Anal-glaucoma

I can't see my ass coming into work today.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I told my boss I had anal glaucoma and he wouldn't believe me

So I told him there was no way I could see my arse coming in today.

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Anal glaucoma

Guy : Hey boss. I need to take the day off.

Boss: Whats going on?

Guy: I think I have anal glaucoma

Boss: Anal glaucoma?

Guy: Yeah, I just cant see my ass coming in to work today

My Asian eye doctor

Since I am half-Chinese and half-Filipino, and in recognition of AAPI month, I shall relate what happened visiting the eye doctor. I had been having trouble seeing while driving, so I went to my eye doctor, who happens to be Asian like me. He did the usual things, the eye charts, peering into my e...

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A man has glaucoma of the ass

A man is just wrapped up in his blankets in bed without a care in the world when the phone by his bed starts ringing. Begrudgingly he answers it.
"Hello?"

"Yeah hi, hello! This is your boss and you're seriously late for work. When the hell are you gonna come in?"

"I'm sorry boss but...

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Jerry's boss called him, "You were supposed to be in the office an hour ago. What's the deal?" Jerry replied, "I think I've got rectal glaucoma."

"Rectal glaucoma‽" his boss shouted in disbelief, "What the hell is that‽"

Jerry explained, "Without going into too much detail, it basically means I can't see my ass comin in today."

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Calling In Sick

A woman calls her boss one morning and tells him that she is staying home because she's not feeling well.

"What's the matter?" he asks.

"I have a case of anal glaucoma," she says in a weak voice.

"What in the hell is anal glaucoma?" he inquires.

"Well, I just can't see my...

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Boss calls an employee who didnt show..

Employee picks up the phone and the boss said "Get your ass to work!". Employee said "I cant boss I got anal glaucoma" boss replied with "What the hell is that". Guy said "Dont see my ass coming into work today".

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I dare someone to pull off this joke IRL.

A manager calls one of his employes because he is very late for work.
The employee picks up the phone. The boss enquires, "John, why aren't you at work?" John responds, "I have a medical condition." Concerned the manager asks, "What is it?" John replies, "I have anal glaucoma." The manager respo...

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