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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Iris‌‌h daughte‌‌r ha‌‌d no‌‌t bee‌‌n hom‌‌e fo‌‌r ove‌‌r ‌‌5 years‌‌. Upo‌‌n he‌‌r retur‌‌n he‌‌r Fathe‌‌r curse‌‌d he‌‌r heavily‌‌.

"Wher‌‌e hav‌‌e y‌‌e bee‌‌n al‌‌l thi‌‌s time‌‌, child‌‌? Wh‌‌y di‌‌d y‌‌e no‌‌t writ‌‌e t‌‌o us‌‌, no‌‌t eve‌‌n ‌‌a line‌‌? Wh‌‌y didn'‌‌t y‌‌e call‌‌? Ca‌‌n y‌‌e no‌‌t understan‌‌d wha‌‌t y‌‌e pu‌‌t ye‌‌r ol‌‌d Mothe‌‌r through?‌‌"
‌‌
Th‌‌e girl‌‌, crying‌‌, replied‌‌, "Dad..‌‌. ‌‌I beca...

I keep asking iris why some people have dyslexia, but she won't answer.

Maybe my iPhone is just broken

My Grandmother was 80% Irish

Her name was Iris.

Financial aid



An Australian guy is traveling around the Greek Islands. He walks into a bar and, by chance, is served by an Australian barmaid. As she takes his order, a Fosters, she notices his accent. Over the course of the evening they get chatting. At the end of her shift he asks if she wants to come b...

I dissected an iris today...

It was an eye opening experience.

We just found out my friend had a collapsed iris 2 years after he got it.

I mean, it wasnt hard to see the problem.

A joke my dad has been telling for 45 years

My dad played high school baseball, and the second baseman, John, eventually grew up to be a very successful accountant and married his high school sweetheart. Over the next 25 years, John also collected rare and antique baseball cards, eventually accumulating the world's most expensive collection…<...

Why a pirate could not spell iris?

He had only one 'i'

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School

The male teacher in a girls’ school asked the science class: “Who can tell me what organ of the human body expands to 10 times its usual size when stimulated? Mary, can you tell me?”

Mary blushed furiously as she stood up. Then replied, “Sir, how dare you ask such a question? I will complain ...

What do they call it when your eye is infected with COVID-19?

Corona-Iris. I'll see myself out.

What’s an optometrist’s favourite terrorist group?

Iris

Eye doctor...

A world famous painter is diagnosed with a serious eye disease and is sure to lose his sight. He goes to a local eye doctor in desperation and after giving it some thought, he is able to reverse the disease and cure the man.

In gratitude, the painter goes to work painting a large rendition o...

In medical school...

Professor: Miss Rogers, what part of the male anatomy may enlarge by a factor of 10 when the male is excited?

Rogers: (Blushing) I... refuse to answer...

Professor: Mr. Smith?

Smith: The iris.

Professor: (coughs) Miss Rogers I can conclude three things. 1. You didn't do t...

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ISIS has reportedly acquired a shitload of cutting edge weapons technology from the Korean black market.

Recent photographs suggest that the technology is known to have an Iris Scanner, S Pen, a 12 MP primary camera and a really mindBLOWING battery life.

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