Five Detroit Tigers fans, Al, Ben, Carl, Dan, and Edgar, are watching a home game for the Tigers. Of course, the Tigers easily lose, and the five fans leave the stadium angrily.

"If those players had played better, we could have won," said Al.

"Don't blame the players, blame the coach," said Ben. "If he had trained the players better, they would have played better."

"Those players couldn't play a decent game if their lives depended on it," said Carl. "But it's...

What did they yell at Edgar Allen Poe when he nearly walked into a tree?

Poetry!

Mr. and Mrs. Johnson had been happily married for decades, but there was one thing that bothered Mr. Johnson.

They had five sons named Al, Ben, Carl, Dan, and Edgar. Now Al, Ben, Carl, and Dan were all tall, thin, and handsome, but Edgar was short, fat, and ugly. Throughout his life, Mr. Johnson wondered if Edgar was really his son, but he never built up the courage to ask his wife.

Finally, the day ...

What's Edgar Alan Poe's favorite vegetable to eat?

Corn on the macabre!

You only have enough time to say one word to Edgar Allan Poe who is about to walk into a tree. What do you say?

Poetry

What do you call it when Edgar Allen Poe hosts an indoor strobe party?

A Rave-in

What do the brave men, and women who protect our towns and cities have in common with some very small bugs that get stuck in Edgar Allan Poe's hair have in common?

They're both Po-Lice.

* my wife kicked me out of the car shortly after telling you this joke. Crazy part about it is I was driving at the time.

My librarian keeps a gerbil in a cage at the reception desk. I asked her, "Why did you name the gerbil Edgar Rice?" "Because," she responded,

"Edgar Rice burrows."

Edgar (His nickname is, 'E') was a good man.

One day he gave me 20 bucks. I said, "Aye, E. I owe you."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Chauncey and Edgar catching up....

Chauncey and Edgar were very old friends who had not seen each other for a while and they wanted to catch up. Edgar invited Chauncey over for lunch. "We're getting on in years" Chauncey said. "Do you still get out much like we used to?" "Not like the old times" replied Edgar. "But I still man...

I'll always be less successful than Edgar Allan Poe

Nevermore

What did the passive aggressive raven say to Edgar Allen Poe?

"...ugh nevermind"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Edgar is sitting in his rocking chair on his back porch...

... watching the river flow, when he notices an old man down by the dock loading up his boat with rolls of tape.
Edgar yells down to the old man,
"Hey old man! Where you going with all that tape?"
The old man replies,
"This here is duck tape. I'm gonna catch me some ducks. You ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a goth prostitute?

Edgar Allan Ho

Credit where credit due,
Thx u/roxy-rambles

Nguyen, who saw by touch. It's original, I swear!

Did you hear about the blind Thai man who was able to tell what race people were by touch? It's true! Just by feeling their hand, old man Nguyen could tell you if somebody was European, African, Polynesian, or American. He was best at Asian countries, just by practice, and could even tell what count...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Outbreak Causes an Early Dismissal at the School

Little Edgar is brought back to class from ISS. As he enters the room, Edgar hears his teacher instruct the students.

Teacher: The same water is in your homes, so to prevent yourselves from being infected with E. Coli, don't drink or brush your teeth with any water that has not been boiled.<...

My pet horse has started writing poetry.

Edgar Allan Poe-ny

Smart parrot

A guy that is lacking some money, teaches his parrot how to recite a couple of famous poems.

Between his neighbours and friends he sells around 7 tickets to see the parrot in a live performance at the garden of his house.

– Thanks for comming in! We will now hear a poem by Edgar Allan ...

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