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Dispensed Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A club I was at had a vending machine that dispensed packets of cologne. I put a quarter in it, turned the knob, and nothing came out.

I guess the machine was out of odor.

J-Lo's new nickname

Jennifer Lopez is called J-Lo. She dropped the last 3 letters of her last name. She got rid of them. Dispensed with them.

Doesn't that make her a pez dispenser?

One Sunday St Peter looks down from Heaven and calls out to Jesus

"Look!" he says. "Father O'Malley is golfing on Sunday!"

Jesus smiles and holds out his hands in blessing. Moments later the Father drives off the first tee and holes in one. When the Father retrieves his ball and goes to the second tee, Jesus again holds out his hands in blessing and the F...

Reading between the lines.

1 Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found

2 hard at work at his desk. He works independently, without

3 wasting company time talking to colleagues. Bob never

4 thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and always

5 finishes given assignments on time. ...

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