The other day I found out that I have hearing problems. I also found out that I’ve gained too much weight to fit into my favorite shirt. I went to talk to my dietician friend who gave me a piece of advice and a pamphlet.

I followed her advice, but now I’m stuck here with a tie dye shirt that still doesn’t fit and a pamphlet on “dieting and weight loss tips”.

Thanos would make a great dietician

Your diet would be perfectly balanced, as all things should be

What advice did the dietician give the tightrope walker?

You need a balanced diet

A dietician was once addressing a large audience in Chicago.

“The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Vegetables can be disastrous, and none of us realises the germs in our drinking water. But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all eat it. Can anyone here ...

Why was the dietician kicked out of the casino?

He was caught counting carbs.

Did you hear about the geologist who got robbed?

Dieticians HATE him! Find out how this geologist lost over 100 stones OVERNIGHT!

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