Sinai Jokes

God: And remember Moses, in the laws of keeping Kosher, never cook a calf in its mother's milk.

Moses: Ohhhhhh! So you are saying we should never eat milk and meat together.

God: No, what I'm saying is, never cook a calf in its mother's milk.

Moses: Oh, Lord forgive my ignora... read more

So Moses comes down from Mt. Sinai with two tablets of stone in his hands and speaks to his people: "Okay folks, I got some goods news and some bad news.
Good news first: I got him down to ten.
The bad news: Adultery is still in."

A woman, calling Mount Sinai Hospital, said, "Hello, I want to know if a patient is getting better."

The voice on the other end of the line said, "What is the patient's name and room number?"

She said, "Yes, darling! She's Sarah Finkel, in Room 302."

He said, "Oh, yes. Mrs. Fink... read more

She timidly asked, "Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?"

The operator said "I'll be glad to help, Dear. What's the name and room number?"

The grandmother in her weak tremulous voice said, "Holly Finkel, room 302."

The Operator replied, "Let... read more

1. talk to burning bush
2. part Red Sea
3. climb Mount Sinai
4. ?????????
5. PROPHET!!!!

"The bad news is adultery stays."

Moses came down from Mount Sinai and announced to the people, "I just got done speaking with God." "No way!" the townspeople shouted. "Yahweh."

A humorous answer to why handwritten digit 7 is commonly written stricken (I've recently read this joke in Russian and made a translation).

When Moses gathered the people at the Mount Sinai, started reading out the 10 commandments and reached the No. 7 (which reads "Thou shalt not commit ... read more

to the top of Mount Sinai to negotiate with God over the commandments. After a month of intense discussion, an exhausted Moses came down with a list of 200 commandments.

The Israelites, however, weren't happy with this, and sent him back up to negotiate a better deal.

A week later, a ... read more

Mr. Smith climbed to the top of Mt. Sinai to get close enough to talk to God.

Looking up, he asked the Lord.. "God, what does a million years mean to you?"

The Lord replied, "A minute."

Smith asked, "And what does a million dollars mean to you?"

The Lord replied, "A pen... read more

The sermon had started before they arrived. As they slowly made their way down the aisle looking for a seat the preacher spoke, "Who was it that spoke to Moses a top Sinai?".
The man poked his wife with the pencil he was carrying and she blurted out "GOD!" in a startled manner.
"Yes!" said t... read more