A woman goes to her doctor to get her third face lift.
The doctor says "I would love to help you but I can't recommend getting another one. You have had too many already." The woman protests and wants to know why she can't get her favorite procedure done again. "Look" says the doctor. "See that cute dimple on your chin? That's your belly ...
“Hi! My name is Gertrude,” says the lady to the man next to her on the airplane.
“It’s so nice to meet you! I’m flying to New York for my grandson’s third birthday. I’m so excited! I remember when he was just a little pumpkin and now he’s already three! It’s really hard to believe. He’s the most adorable thing you’ve ever seen! You know what? Hold on, I think I might have a pict...
My wife has the cutest dimples. But she hates when I tell people that because She’s real self conscious about her cellulite.
I was talking to a lovely young lady and things seemed to be going really well.
Then she said "There's something I want to get out of the way right now," and she reached up and took a wig off her head, and it turned out she was as bald as a new-laid egg.
"Alopecia," she said. "It's a condition that causes hair to fall out."
"Oh," I said. "...Just on your head, or ...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A traveller enters a mysterious looking hotel and is greeted by a rather attractive girl sitting behind the check in desk.
She smiles at him, exposing slightly crooked teeth and endearing dimples. "You can have me, right here, right now." She gestures to a door he hadn't noticed before and continues, "Or, you can carry on to success."
The traveller is a little nonplussed, a little flattered about being propositio...
A collection of Waspy jokes about yo-mamma
1. Your mother is so déclassé, she has a time-share near Sea World!
2. Your mother is so prescription drug dependent, she pops Xanax like Godiva bonbons!
3. Your mother is so lower middle-class, she thinks Egyptian cotton smells of camels!
4. Your mother...