Drug cartels have been turning to toilet paper instead of narcotics for profits
I guess you can say the crack has been wiped out clean.
What did Pablo Escobar say when he was ratted out by members of his own cartel?
"I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you Medellín kids"
Do you know how much pressure did the Cartel put on the Columbian goverment in the 80s?
If the Mexican Drug Cartel had a slogan
It would be "Putting the 'Juan' in 'Marijuana'"
A blonde joins a Mexican cartel
The cartel sends her to Colombia to get coke and she brings Pepsi.
What does the Mexican cartel do after every murder?
They move on to the next Juan.
What do you get when you cross a Drug cartel and a Mafia lord?
A man with anxiety accidentally annoyed the cartel
He began seeing a psychiatrist because of hispanic attacks.
Bosnian guy called Sakib just started working as a car salesman in Germany
Bosnian guy called Sakib just started working as a car salesman in Germany.
First day passes by and Sakib sells 10 cars to some Chinese guys. His boss is shocked, and then ask him: "Sakib, how did you sell 10 cars?" To which Sakib replies: "Boss, all people around the globe know me." Boss jus...
A man is pulled over by a rookie cop...
When the cop approaches the window, the man produces his papers then says “I’m sure you’re going to ask about the body in the trunk since you obviously smell the weed.” The cop nearly fell back, but before he could utter a word, the man said “just be careful, the knife is under my seat.” The rookie...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
I was sitting at a long stoplight yesterday, minding my own business, patiently waiting for it to turn green even though there was no on-coming traffic.
A carload of Mexican cartel gang members pulled up next to me in their low-rider. Six sets of eyeballs set in faces covered with tattoos stared menacingly at me and there commenced some spirited discussion between the members and I seemed to be the subject of it. I was getting nervous and had just c...
"Oh man, Juan Valdez died this morning."
Ok, so it's not a 'joke' joke, but that's what you say. Maybe at work, at the bar with friends. Say it in a lull in the conversation. If you're really good, say it while scanning the paper or a news site.
Some people go, "oh!" And some people say, "wait, the Colombian coffee merchant?" an...
Enrique Peña Nieto, Malala Yousafzai, and Donald Trump are walking along a beach
It's a bit of an oldie, and I think the last time I heard it, it came off as pretty racist. But I think the current political climate allows me to rehash it better.
Enrique Peña Nieto, who is the Mexican President, is walking along the beach one day with the US President, Donald Trump, and p...
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An ethnically diverse group of people are doing something…
An African-American, a Mexican-American, Jewish-American, and a white man are walking along the beach in Florida. One of them stumbles over a lamp and as he picks it up, a genie appears. The genie thanks them from freeing him from the lamp and offers them each a wish. The African-American says, "My ...
Topical Jokes for 1/6
A report shows that North Korea has 6,000 cyber attack specialists. In fairness, North Korea’s definition of “cyber attack specialist” is anyone who’s ever watched “The Matrix.”
...these cyber attack specialists can access any computer on the planet, and leave the message “Please. Help me get...
TIL about Mexican drug birds.
During the early 60s drug cartels would use South-American mallard flocks to smuggle drugs over the border.
The birds' predictable migration patterns and considerable size made them perfect for the job, until a few years later.
That's when the ducks got wise and just started smoking ...