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American Football Jokes

Who is Ghlislane Maxwells favorite American Football player?

Chase Young

Why don't any American football players wear glasses?

Because it is a contact sport!

If American football switched to metric

They'd have to convert 4th and inches

What is the object of American football played by really cheap people?

Get the quarter back.

What is American football called in other countries?

30.48 cm ball

As a Brit, I can't get into American football

They rugby the wrong way

Did you hear about the Owl that could play American football?

It was a superb_owl.

A Catholic High School had a legendary American football team

Every year, the team was in the state championship game, and usually won it handily. Every able lad within a few hundred miles wanted to play football for Central Catholic Fighting Knights.

Those who were familiar with the program, knew that the true heart and soul of the Knights football pro...

My friend spends 75% of his time playing American Football and the other 25% playing Baroque music.

He's a quarterbach.

The Queen of England doesn't know much about American football...

But she does wish someone would do something about those troublesome Patriots.

What's Al-Qaeda's favorite American football team?

The New York jets.

My new american football video game has so many glitches.

It's really maddening

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An American, Englishman, & Australian were arguing which of their versions of football were the toughest.

An American, and Englishman, and an Australian were discussing which of their particular brands of football were the toughest.

The American said, "We've got this quarterback Peyton Manning who's just won his second Super Bowl ring. Well, one day Manning was sacked so hard, his front split op...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Corporate Ladder

A recent study in USA have found an interesting relationship between a man social status and the sport he watches

1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL
2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employee is BOWLING
3. The sport of choice for front line workers is Ame...

The animals were bored.

Finally the lion had an idea. He tells the other animals how he's seen the humans play a game called American football. He proceeded to tell them how it's played and explained its rules. This got them excited.

They chose their teams and went out to an open field. The lion's team received, and...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

One day, John goes to his doctor for a red face

The doctor tells him "Ah, I've seen this a few times before. It must be Red Skull syndrome". John exclaims "Red skull, like the movie!? How do I stop it?. The doctor then replies "To cure Red Skull syndrome, you should spend some time doing American things such as baseball or eating burgers and your...

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