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Blocking Jokes

I told my wife a joke about blocking a river but she got annoyed.

I said “why are you so upset? it’s just a dam joke”

Elon Musk is considering removing blocking from Twitter

Which means your only options for defense will now be dodge and counter.

My friends were blocking highways in order to protest and were eventually arrested

For human trafficking

I’m sitting here thinking about leaving my husband. He hasn’t been intimate with me since our son died. I would leave right now,

But the ambulance is still in the drive way blocking my car.

Hey girl are you blocking a water source

Because... Dam.

My original joke on my tinder profile. Idk if this should be on r/dadjokes

If I could rearrange the alphabet I’d move U

Cause you’re blocking the TV

Over the past year, I've been blocking every account that's reposted a joke.

It's so lonely in here now.

Two miners got trapped in a dark tunnel after a mine collapse, blocking their way in, and cutting off the power and lights.

One miner remained calm. He knew that there was other exits from the mine, but in the complete darkness, he had no way to navigate. He remained trapped.

The other miner started panicking. It was so dark, he had a wife and kids at home, he didn’t want to die like this. He was hyperventilating....

A coach full of jazz musicians has broken down on the motorway, blocking all lanes.

Police say to expect some long jams.

People told me I was blocking the road...

I replied: "No Way!!!"

Beavers get a lot of flak for building their shelters and blocking water ways-

But they are Damed if they do, and Damned if they don't

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman grants her mother's unusual dying wish.

She specifically requested pictures of her right foot be sent to an address in Rhode Island.

A couple of days later, she realizes that reversed pictures of her mother's *left* foot were sent instead. Unsure of the importance, but determined to fulfill her wishes, the woman travels to Rhode Is...

I went out to a fine Italian restaurant last night but there was a large woman blocking the entrance....

I couldn’t get pasta

I was arrested for blocking a bunch of children on a sidewalk

"You're creating a major disturbance." The police officer says.

To which I responded "no, I'm only creating a minor disturbance."

Roosevelt, Churchill, and Stalin are riding in a car in Crimea when suddenly they see a big bull blocking the road.

Roosevelt gets out of the car and asked the bull to move, but the bull doesn't move. Churchill began to plead with the bull to move over, but the bull pays zero attention. Finally, Stalin walks over to the bull and whispers something in its ear, after which the bull sprints off into the distance. In...

My summer camp, which was all about focus and blocking out distractions, did really poorly this year

Apparently no one wants to go to a concentration camp

A stagecoach stops in the forest. The driver says to the guy blocking the road "What are you doing? Who the hell do you think you are?"

"I'm Robbin!"

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