Quarterback Jokes

They had great seats right behind their team's bench.

After the game, he asked her how she liked it.

"Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the

tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't

understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."<... read more

He's the Quarterback.



(My 2nd joke attempt X\_X)

I said “wow, really?! You want me to play in the NFL?”

He said “No moron, this drink costs 75c and I gave you a dollar”

El Passo.

What are some of the best "Yo mama" jokes of recent times?


I'll go first: Yo mama's so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund.

# POST REMOVED

**Rule 10 -** Overly ***offensive*** content

The Chicago Bears were desperately looking for a new quarterback. With all normal options not working out they looked outside the United States. They found a terrorist in Iran who was able to throw a grenade 100 yards and have it go through a 3rd story window every time. The Bears signed him immedi... read more

In English class, the teacher asked 'what comes after a sentence', and someone yelled out 'an appeal'.The science teacher asked the class how to prove the law of gravity. They threw her out the window."I tell you...at the football games, after our team sacked the quarterback, they went after his fam... read more

Intentional Grounding

...but my boss said we couldn't be anything offensive.

His answers were just as brief:

"Hut, Hutt, Hike!"

"That's nothing," I replied. "I'm 90% belly."

He was trying to make ends meet

Tres-passing

As he’s running he’s talking himself up like “yeah, you’re the best” “you’re gonna throw that ball so hard bro”

as he’s jogging he begins to hear screaming down the street and sees an area that seems brighter than the rest. He wraps around the corner to see what’s happening.

As he ar... read more

I would have liked to have seen Montana.

Because they finally got their quarterback.

Nickleback

A quarterback

What's a Bears quarterback favorite thing to have for breakfast, Turnovers!

Baseball is different from any other sport, very different. For instance, in most sports you score points or goals; in baseball you score runs. In most sports the ball, or object, is put in play by the offensive team; in baseball the defensive team puts the ball in play, and only the defense is allo... read more

Quarterback

It was a particularly tough football game, and nerves were on edge. The home team had been the victim of three or four close calls, and they were now trailing the visitors by a touch-down and a field goal. When the official called yet another close one in the visitors' favor, the home quarterback bl... read more

The head coach of the Browns is looking for a new QB when he sees news footage of a man in Afghanistan.

This man is fighting the Taliban and in the space of a few seconds, the coach sees him burst through a wooden barricade, knock down 10 armed soldiers, run 100 yards in 10 seconds, pick up a... read more

…he’s a quarterback

To get the quarterback.

He's a quarterback.

He wants his quarterback.

Started as a fullback, then was a halfback and ended up a quarterback.

She thought a quarterback was a refund

They're both places you can get a quarterback

A quarterback

A high school decides to put on a reunion for the class of '98. Turnout is slow at first, but eventually the well known former students start to show up. There's student body president Leslie Pindogs and her kids, star quarterback Robert Course and his wife Molly, valedictorian Sandra Kevver and her... read more

All that’s missing is a great quarterback. A scout has been looking everywhere for someone good enough, but cheap enough to keep them under the salary cap.

The scout, after a long day of searching, comes home defeated. He slumps down into his chair and decides to watch the news.

As h... read more

Okay so the animals have been on the ark for thirty days and thirty nights and frankly they are getting bored. So to provide entertainment B-Deck challenges C-Deck to a game of football. They get it all set up and begin play. B-Deck makes some early gains but C-Deck is unstoppable. They have Rhinoce... read more

At the Pearly Gates, God tells Brady, "As a reward for such a fine football career I am giving you a house. Now, not everyone gets a house up here, in fact it's quite rare. Tom, consider this is a personal gift from the Lord your God." The Almighty shows him to his new home and Brady is somewhat ta... read more

Everybody knows that the lion is the king of the jungle. Always has been, and for generations it seemed like he always would be. One afternoon, however, after a particularly poorly received watering hole decision, the elephant had had enough.

“Lion,” he said, “I’ve been your major domo for a... read more

Every year, the team was in the state championship game, and usually won it handily. Every able lad within a few hundred miles wanted to play football for Central Catholic Fighting Knights.

Those who were familiar with the program, knew that the true heart and soul of the Knights football pro... read more