Peter Gabriel, after watching Miley Cyrus's "Wrecking Ball" video.
"Well, I certainly don't wanna be HER sledgehammer!"
"Hey Honey, I made some brownies as an apology for wrecking your car today." "You did what?!"
"Brownies, you deaf idiot"
Why are demolition experts and dominatrixes alike?
They both like wrecking balls
A company in my town manufactures tile discs...
but their machine can only make them so fast before it starts wrecking them. I found a function that solves the problem simply by improving the machine’s code, but they laughed when I told them I had a wrecked tile disc function.
Knock knock. Who's there?
Hakeem.
Hakeem who?
Hakeem in like a wrecking ball!!!
What a horrible way to die
Two guys meet up in a bar.
The first one asks, "Did your hear the news - Mike is dead??!!!"
"Woah, what the hell happened to him?"
"Well he was on his way over to my house the other day and when he arrived outside the house he didn't brake properly and boom - He hit the curb,...
A man is speaking with Saint Peter at the gates of Heaven.
Saint Peter asks him if he has done any good deeds in his time on Earth to merit entry into paradise.
Thinking for a moment, he says, "I was once in a bar in Arizona. I noticed a beautiful woman sitting alone, but before I could introduce myself a bunch of Hell's Angels stormed in and starte...
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