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Shipwreck Jokes

A man gets shipwrecked on a small island.

After a few days wandering, he comes across a tribe of natives who have just lost their chieftain.

The tribe's high priest tells the man that as he is the first outsider they have seen in twenty years, he must take three tests.

If he passes all three tests, the tribe will accept him as...

The cast of Friends got shipwrecked on an deserted island...

Monica, Joey and Chandler were left behind because in real life David is a Schwimmer and Lisa Kudrow.

Three people became shipwrecked on an island inhabited by cannibals.

They were swiftly captured and told they would be killed, cooked, eaten, and their skin would be used to line the tribe’s canoes, but they would be able to choose how they died.

The first man, a British man, decided he wanted to die by the sword. In an instant, a tribesman cut his head off. ...

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A shipwrecked man washes up onto a deserted beach.

He meets a couple that's also stranded there. He and the wife immediately lock eyes and feel the chemistry for some genital bonding.

The Husband tells the Stranger: "hey man, see that tall coconut tree over there? We take turns all day climbing it to the top and seeing if any ships are approa...

A man gets shipwrecked on a desert island with only a dog and a pig…

…after many weeks without the touch of a woman - the pig begins to look very attractive. One night, the deprived man begins to chance his luck with the pig. Over dinner, he tweaks its tail, plays footsie with its trotters, and cuddles in close. The dog, witnessing all this, becomes very jealous, and...

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An american dude, A French dude, and a Japanese dude barely survive a shipwreck...

While clinging to floating debris and paddling towards shore they discuss what they will do to survive.
The American dude says: Well, I am a carpenter by trade, so I'll build us a shelter.
The French dude says: Ho-hoh! Yers trulee eez the greatest chef ever! I shall make grand meals to feed us...

A Man gets shipwrecked

He washes up ashore on an Australian beach. Unconscious, he's taken to a hospital, and wakes up the next day. Upon waking up, he notices how filthy the hospital is. The conditions are really terrible.

A nurse comes to check on him. "This hospital is terrible! You brought Me Here To *Die*?" H...

After a terrible shipwreck,,,

After a terrible shipwreck, a man found himself alone on an island. He went about the island in search of food and shelter. After a long walk, the man froze in terror as he saw a tribe of cannibals in the middle of a celebration.

The man thought to himself, "I am so screwed!" To his surpr...

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Two guys and a girl become shipwrecked on a deserted island...

...but fortunately there is plenty of food and fresh water. Over the next few months, they build a little community: all three craft little huts out of sticks and leaves, and they fairly split up all the tasks and chores essential to their survival. They even build a little church where they go to p...

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Scarlett Johansson and some guy were the only survivors of a shipwreck.

They didn't know each other before the shipwreck, but he did know who she was...

At the beginning it was hard, but as time passed, this guy learnt how to provide food and shelter, he started taking care of her, and eventually she started caring about him... after all, there wasn't anybody els...

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An Australian, and Englishman, and a Japanese guy are shipwrecked...

An Australian, and Englishman, and a Japanese guy are shipwrecked after their cruiseship sank.

After they compose themselves, the Englishman takes charge of the situation.

He turns to the Australian: "alright chap, I think I shall go down the beach to search for food, shelter, supplie...

Four men were stranded on a small island after surviving a shipwreck

20 year old, 30, 40 and a 60 year old.

After a short while they noticed another island nearby with many beautiful, naked women walking about.

The 20 year old said: "let's swim over there", swiftly jumped in the water and off he swam fast towards the other island.

The 30 year ol...

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Guy is shipwrecked on a desert island.

Not much to do, just some trees with coconuts, some sand... and a sheep.

After a few weeks, the guy starts feeling a little hard up, so he tries to catch the sheep and have his way with it. Alas, he cannot catch the sheep. Every day it gets worse- he is increasingly more horny, but the shee...

So a guy gets shipwrecked on an island with nothing but a dog and a goat.

As time passes, he decides he needs some action, and, well, the goats not lookin half bad.

However, anytime the man tries to make a move on the goat, the dog gets jealous, snaps at him and won’t let him by.

Eventually, another ship wrecks, this time carrying a blonde babe. Just absolu...

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Shipwrecked Australian

A typical Australian guy, having split from his latest girlfriend, decided to take a holiday. He booked himself on a cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life. That is, until the ship sank! He found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts...

A shipwrecked mariner has spent several years on a deserted island, completely alone.

Then one morning he was thrilled to see a ship offshore and a smaller vessel pulling out towards him.

When the boat grounded on the beach, the officer in charge handed the marooned sailor a bundle of newspapers and told him: “The captain said to read through these and let us know if you still...

A man, a dog, and a goat are the only survivors of a shipwreck

They end up on a deserted island. After a few weeks, the man is feeling very lonely and starts looking at the goat in a new light. One day he tries to have his way with it but the dog growls and scares him off. He goes to sleep unsatisfied.

The next day he tries again, but the dog is there, ...

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3 men in a shipwreck drift upon an island

Upon searching the island, they find it's inhabited by cannibals. The king of the cannibals says, "go out and bring us 10 pieces of fruit or we will eat you". So each of the men goes looking for 10 pieces of fruit. The first one comes back with 10 apples. The king of the cannibals says "now shove th...

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Three men shipwrecked

Three men are shipwrecked on an island infested with cannibals. They were brought to the cannibal king who tells the three men that they must complete a series of tests so that they will not be eaten. The first task, he tells them to bring back 10 pieces of the same fruit. So they go out to scavenge...

A guy, a pig, and a dog are the only survivors of a terrible shipwreck, and they find themselves stranded on a desert island.

After being there for awhile, they get into a ritual of going to the beach every night to watch the sun go down.

One particular evening, the sky was red with beautiful cirrus clouds, the breeze was warm and gentle -- in short, a perfect night for romance! Well, that pig started looking bette...

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Two men and a woman are shipwrecked on an island...

Eventually the men start to feel the calling of being a man and respectably ask the woman if they would be able to unleash their urges. The woman agrees and they proceed to do the job. This goes on for a couple of months and the woman takes turns with each of them whenever they feel their call. Even...

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Two men are shipwrecked on an island... (long)

They decide to explore the island to look for food as they are quite hungry. After a while of searching they find a cabin hidden in the middle of the woods and there's smoke coming from the chimney.

The first man tells the second he'll go knock and check it out and that the other should stay ...

A young man was shipwrecked on a remote island.

Although he had plenty of food and water, there was nothing for him to do except play with himself. After many years, even that became so monotonous that he couldn't even get an erection . Now, completely without any happiness, he started to lose his sanity. One morning, as he is lying on the beach,...

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Shipwrecked

So a guy is involved in a shipwreck, and manages to swim to a deserted island. He's there for three years, living on coconuts and crabs.

Then one day a barrel floats ashore. The top pops off the barrel, and a woman climbs out.

"Oh my god!" says the guy.

"Wow," says the woman. "I...

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Two shipwrecked lawyers

They were stranded for about two years.

A beautiful woman comes walking down the beach. One turns to the other and says, “Let’s fuck her.”

The other says, “Out of what?”

Shipwrecked

There was a shipwreck and just three men and one woman survived. It's was remote island and no hope for rescue so they decided to make the best of it and built a small settlement on the island. For survival of humanity they decided that there would take turns having the woman as their wife one week ...

Shipwrecked

A married couple were enjoying a luxury South Sea cruise until their liner was shipwrecked and they were washed ashore on a desert island, the only survivors.

Day after day, they looked hopefully out to sea in the hope of spotting a passing vessel but none came. As boredom set in, they star...

Shipwrecked

A man was shipwrecked on an isolated island with nobody for company except his faithful dog. Many months passed and life was getting monotonous until one day he spotted a sheep on the other side of the island.


Slowly approaching the sheep, he managed to get it into position and was abou...

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An American, a Mexican, and a Canadian are all shipwrecked on a tropical island..

When they are taken captive by the local tribe. The tribal lead tells them "the bad news is, we are going to kill you. We will use your bones for our tools, your muscle for food, and your flesh for our canoes. The good news is, we will let you choose how we kill you.

The American chooses to ...

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3 men shipwrecked on desert island

(Beer garden banter joke. Works best when you use yourself and people you know as the protagonists, just replace names and choose the butt of the joke)

3 men get shipwrecked on a desert island.
Their boat ruined they head in-land to find salvation, when out of the trees lunges a huge 7 fo...

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A shipwrecked group

A shipwreck left a group of 4 men and a woman stranded on an island. It quickly became apparent that rescue was unlikely and they did their best to adapt to their new circumstances. A part of that was the agreement that each man would get one week if the month to partner with the woman for sex &am...

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A shipwrecked Scotsman is rescued by a Royal Navy destroyer

...he is taken to the sick bay where a beautiful young nurse is waiting.

"Our Captain wanted me to tell that he is from Aberdeen and wants his countryman to be receive the best of care. How long has it been since you had a drink of Whisky?"

"Five long years my dear." The Scotsman rep...

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A sailor and a female model survive a shipwreck.

A ship sinks, and a sailor and a female model manage to swim to an unpopulated island. There are enough resources for them to survive, so they start to live there, eventually becoming a couple. After two years, the sailor suddenly looks at the model with a desperate expression, and says" "I cannot t...

Shipwreck

A cruise ship get badly damaged by the iceberg. Passengers crowd on the deck. It is obvious they need to jump into the water, but it's cold and three particular groups of tourists are hesistant.

Captain walks up to the first group, who are americans, tells them something and they all jump....

A Man is Shipwrecked On A Tropical Island...

He finds a native village on the shore. The people there take him in, and he has a pleasant life while waiting for rescue. Only one thing bothers him. From the villages up in the hills he can hear drums beating constantly, night and day.
He talks to the chief of the village,
"Those drums ...

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After being shipwrecked, Joe washed up on a tropical island...

The modernized local tribe soon found him, fed and clothed him, then took him to their chief. Conversing in fluent English, Joe and the chief took a liking to one another, and the chief soon offered Joe his beautiful daughter's hand in marriage. Having just been shipwrecked and being a shy virgin,...

What do you call a journal, found in a shipwreck, detailing the hydration levels of lumbejacks?

A waterlogged logging water log.

A man gets shipwrecked at sea

After what felt like days floating on wreckage he washes up on an unknown shore.

He starts to wander around the beautiful land, the air smelled sweeter than any air he’d ever breathed, everything looked clearer than real life. His hunger suddenly hits him and he wished for a big sandwich and...

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A guy shipwrecks on a deserted island...

And after several weeks he becomes lonely and wishes for a companion.
Lo and behold the very next day, a ship with 6 beautiful women crashes. They start to talking and decide that they will share the man. One will sleep with him each night of the week. The man gets a day off, and the cycle repeat...

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Three men shipwreck on an island known for cannibals.

As they wander the jungle they are captured by these cannibals and put in a cage. The biggest and ugliest cannibal approaches the cage and says
"Now we're fun loving cannibals and we like to play games. We'll give you a chance to escape for our amusement, with one item of your choice. If you...

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A shipwrecker was swimming in the sea with his last ounce of strength, when he saw an island.

He rejoiced and started to swim towards the shore, when suddenly, he felt something squeeze him hard by the balls.

An unknown creature appeared below the surface of the water. Surprisingly, it spoke with a deep voice:
"Plus two or minus two?"
He was puzzled, but he wanted to get t...

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A Frenchman, an American and an Indian guy are shipwrecked.

They're floating in the water and a shark swims up. Comes in for the kill and eats the Frenchman. Comes back around and grabs the American. At this point the shark swims up to the Indian, sniffs around a little bit and then disinterestedly starts swimming away. The Indian shouts out to the shark, "h...

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The only survivor of a shipwreck washes up on a deserted island

He’s stranded alone on the island for over ten years surviving on coconuts and fish. One day he’s sitting on the beach thinking about life back home when a woman in a wetsuit and scuba gear stands up in the ocean and starts walking out of the surf, fins in hands. The man shakes his head and blinks h...

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Guy is the sole survivor of a shipwreck, and washes up on a desert island.

The only thing to eat are coconuts, from a single coconut tree on the other side of the island. However, there's a dog guarding the tree, and every time the guy climbs the tree to get a one, the dog bites him on the ass.

For ten months, the guy has to deal with the dog, whenever he wants to ...

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Shipwrecked

After a shipwreck a young sailor an old man and his hot young trophy wife all make it to a deserted island. The sailor says Im going to climb up that palm tree and see if there is any one out there looking for us. He climbs up the tree and when he get to the top he looks down and yells "hey cut that...

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A Scotsman was shipwrecked...

...and finally washed ashore on a small island. As he regains consciousness on the beach, he sees a beautiful unclad nymphet standing over him. She asks, "Would you like some food?" The Scot hoarsely croaks, "Och, lassie, I havna' ittin a bite in a week noo and I am verra hungry!" She disappears int...

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Shipwrecked!

A young wife, her boorish husband and a good-looking sailor were ship-wrecked on an island and had already been there for awhile.

One morning the sailor climbed a tall coconut tree and yelled, "Stop fucking her down there!"

"What's the matter with you?" asked the husband after the sa...

romanian joke: 300 sailors and one woman get shipwrecked on an island

After one month, completely disgusted by what the sailors have been doing to her, the woman kills herself.

After another month, completely disgusted by what they did that month, the sailors decide to bury her.

After another month, completely disgusted by what they've been doing, th...

An Irishman and an Englishman are shipwrecked together on a desert island.

Waking up on the shore, all they find is a bottle of fresh water from the boat they were on.

"We should save this until we come up with a plan. We each get half, agreed?," said the Englishman.

"Agreed," replied the Irishman.

Night fell and the two men went to sleep. Upon...

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A man is shipwrecked on a deserted island...

...and spends many months alone. Just as he's reaching the point that he's starting to go crazy, he spots a ship in the distance and, all excited, lights a fire on the beach that he'd prepared for just such an eventuality.

He's overjoyed when he sees the ship change course and start heading f...

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A guy is in a shipwreck…

The only survivors are him and (insert you favorite celebrity/supermodel here). The two are there for years and in spite of her celebrity and his relative ordinariness the two fall in love and live very happily together for many years. One day she tells him, "Ive been so happy with you these past ...

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[long] An Italian, an Englishman, and an American shipwreck on an island..

They wander for a bit until they find a tribe of ritualistic cannibals, who conveniently speak English. These cannibals explain that they are to kill them, eat them, and turn their skin into canoes. However, they're not TOTAL savages, so they will allow the 3 shipwrecked to choose their cause of dea...

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So only 7 people survived the shipwreck

6 men and a woman ended up on a isolated island after surviving the shipwreck. Soon an agreement was made: each day of the week she'd have sex with one of the men.
Everything was going great, they were getting along, everybody was as happy as possible.
One day the woman dies.
After th...

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Three men were shipwrecked and washed up onto a tropical island...

After the first night the men woke up in the morning and were surrounded by a native tribe of the island.

Not being able to understand the language the men believed they were being rescued by the tribe.

They returned to the tribes village and quickly learned that tribe was cannibalis...

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2 friends shipwrecked on a desert island.....

....walking around trying to find help they got captured by a tribute living on that island. The chief of tribute , that is against all laughters, says to them:
"well.. I will give you ONE chance to get out from here alive, what you will need to do is: go into the jungle, and bring me back 50 fru...

Three men are shipwrecked...

... they drift towards an island unconsciously. They awake to be taken captive by a local cannibalistic tribe. The tribe chief tells the first man that the tribe will eat his meat, and he is to chose his own death. The man thinks about it and decides decapitation. So he is decapitated.

The ch...

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A boat was shipwrecked in the South Pacific, as a result...

A group of people from different nationalities found themselves stranded on a remote and beautiful island. The party consisted of:

-Two Italian men and one Italian woman

-Two French men and one French woman

-Two German men and one German woman

-Two Greek men and one Greek...

[OC] What do you call the last two survivors of a shipwreck?

Sole mates.

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A man is shipwrecked on an island

A man is sailing off the coast of Australia when a storm hits. He ends up shipwrecked on a little island.

There are just pastures and a few farms, so he goes up to one of the farms and asks if he can stay. A couple of grizzled old shepherds are there, and they give him lodging.

The ne...

What happens when you witness a shipwreck?

You let it sink in.

Three women were stranded on an island after a shipwreck

Three women were stranded on an island after a shipwreck, a redhead, brunette and a blonde. The nearest civilization was a 40 mile swim away. The redhead swam 10 miles and drowned. The brunette swam 15 miles and drowned. The blonde swam 20 miles, became exhausted and decided she wouldn't be able to ...

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Not having sex tonight

One evening last week，my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well，the passion starts to heat up，and she eventually says，‘I don‘t feel like it，I just want you to hold me.‘

I said，‘WHAT??!! What was that?!‘

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear.... <...

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Cannibals and Shipwrecked Survivors

An Englishman, a Frenchman, and an American are shipwrecked. They wash up onto a island that is inhabited by cannibals, and are captured. The cannibals string them up, and bring them before the High Shaman

"You have invaded our sacred lands," says the High Shaman. "We are going to kill you. W...

Two of us washed up on a desert island, the only survivors of a shipwreck.

"There's no animals here but there's plenty of fruit and plants" said the other bloke, "this is Paradise because I'm a vegan."

He laughed and said, "You'll have to become vegan too."

"No, I wont" I said, as I picked up a rock.

Three blondes are lost after a shipwreck...

After the shipwreck, they wake up at a deserted island. They don't know what to do, tired and hungry, when one of them find a shining object lying on the beach. It is a golden lamp.

After a couple of hours, one of the blondes has the idea to rub the lamp. Surprisingly, a genie appears. "You h...

Apparently many cannibals agree that people that have been in multiple shipwrecks taste better.

You could say that they prefer seasoned survivors.

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3 men are shipwrecked on an island

And start searching the place, but get captured by a cannibal tribe. They are brought to the chieftain, and beg for their lives.

He says, "I will give you a chance to live. Each of you must go out and find 10 of a certain fruit, and then come back. If you do not return, we will hunt you d...

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A Brit, a Frenchman, and an American are shipwrecked at sea...

They wash up on an island where they are captured by a tribe of cannibals. The Chief of the tribe says to the three men,"We are going to sacrifice all of you, eat you, and use your skins for a canoe. We will allow you each to choose how you die." The Brit asks for poison. The Chief hands him a cup a...

Three men discover they have each been the victim of a shipwreck at some point in their past.

Three men are talking about their brushes with disaster, and by a stunning coincidence they find that all three of them have, at some point in their lives, been shipwrecked and stranded with the other survivors on a deserted island. They begin to detail their experiences.

"The hardest part wa...

Three friends are shipwrecked on a desert island

After days of despair, one of them stumbles across a lamp and shows it to the others. They rub it and sure enough a genie appears.



**"I AM THE GENIE OF THE LAMP, AND I WILL GRANT YOU EACH ONE WISH"**



The first friend immediately declares "I wish I was at home with my fa...

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Three guys get shipwrecked on an uncharted island...

Three guys get shipwrecked on an uncharted island and wake up in the captivity of an ugly troll. The troll tells each of them that they must go out into the wilderness and bring back 5 fruits of any kind. So the men agreed to the challenge and set off to find their fruits.

The first guy comes...

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An Irishman has been shipwrecked and stranded on an island for over 20 years. [MEDIUM]

One day, on his daily walk of the beach, he sees something way out in the ocean. At first he couldn’t make out what it was, as it got closer, he could see something red.

Finally, it was close enough to determine that the red was actually the hair of a woman. A very pretty dame in her 20s. ...

A man is shipwrecked on a tropical island

He wanders along the beach and finds a village. The villagers are friendly, and take him in. He enjoys life in the village, except for one thing. All day and all night, he can hear the sound of drums from up in the hills.

One day he asks the chief, "What is the deal with those drums? It never...

There were two economists who were shipwrecked on a desert island.

They had no money but over the next three years they made millions of dollars selling their hats to each other.

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A man and Kate Upton are shipwrecked

A man and Kate Upton are shipwrecked on a lonly island.
They try to light up a fire for bypassing ships or planes, but without any result.
After a couple days they start to get along, find some food sources and build a shelter.He begins to flirt with her, so as time passes by they start havin...

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Two men were shipwrecked on an island.

They decided to venture inland to see if they could find help. The men came across a village in the middle of a jungle, and they were immediately surrounded by a tribe of islanders.

The chief of the tribe walks up to the men and says, ”Death or Boogaloo?”

The first man thinks for a se...

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A father shark and a son shark come across a shipwreck...

The son shark immediately starts swimming for the people, anxious for the easy meal. The father shark stops him. The son shark asks "Why can't I eat the people?". The father explains to him, "In a moment son...watch me". The father shark proceeds to swim around the people, showing his fins. He swims...

Why did the shipwrecked pirates get to eat cakes, cookies and pies when they washed up on shore?

It was a desserted island.

Three guys are shipwrecked on a desert island.

Unfortunately for them, they're quickly taken prisoner by the native cannibal tribe. The cannibal chief comes to the tree where they're tied up and says, "I have good news and bad news. The bad news is, we're cannibals, and we're going to kill each of you, eat the meat and use the skin to make a can...

A man of God floating around in the ocean after a shipwreck.

Suddenly a small vessel appears. The captain offers to save him. The man replies: "No, i'm fine. God will save me." The Captain leaves him.

After some time, another boat appears. This time, a fishing boat. The fishermen quickly throw in a net into the water and asks the man to grab onto it so...

A wealthy man walks into a bar...

*I've seen a joke here about a man with* ***a head the size of an orange*** *which is an absurdist response to an old dirty joke. I'm not sure everyone knows the original. I'll put the anti-joke version in the comments.*

\--------------

A wealthy man walks into a bar. He is clearly ric...

It turns out I was guilty of a major misconception with this whole abortion thing

I thought "Row vs Wade" was a decision shipwreck survivors had to make

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So there's this terrible shipwreck, with only three survivors - a French guy, a British guy, and a guy from New Jersey.

So there's a terrible shipwreck, and there are only three survivors that wash up onto a desert island - a French guy, a British guy, and a guy from New Jersey. They're immediately captured by cannibals and spend days locked in a cage, awaiting their fate. Finally the Chief of the cannibals comes t...

A joke from Ukraine about cultural differences [my translation].

[edit - grammar]

In a psychological experiment, three women - Arab, French, and Ukrainian - are asked the same question: "suppose you survive a shipwreck and are stranded on an uninhabited tropical island ... with fifteen brutal, muscular, stressed-out sailors, and noone else, what would you ...

There was a shipwreck off a deserted island in the middle of nowhere! The only survivors were three boys named Mike, Kyle, and Nate. After the wreck the boys decided to wander the island to see if they could find some food...

As the boys were wandering the island one of the boys stepped on a lamp and began to rub it when out of nowhere a genie popes out and grants them three wishes. They all think about it for a while until they came to the conclusion that they all get one wish. The first wish was Nate’s and he said that...

The priest and the sinking ship

A ship is sinking and the passengers are rushing to rescue boats to leave the shipwreck. On the ship there is a priest who refuses to get on the boats.



The lifeguard says "get on the boat priest, we have to go".


The priest says "No, god will save me, give my seat to someone...

A man was having a few in the local bar

when he noticed a sailor sitting at the other end of the bar. The sailor had a completely normal physique except for one anomaly: his head was tiny, about the size of an orange.

The man stared at the sailor in puzzlement, and after a few more drinks screwed up his courage to go over and ask t...

A ship sinks, there are three survivors…

…a Chinese guy, a British guy and an American guy.

They meet on a deserted island. Soon, they realize they have to find a wat to get off the island if they are going to survive this mess. They get together on the beach and tasks are divided. The Britton searces the island for wood to make a ...

When do cannibals eat seafood?

When there is a shipwreck next to their island.

A ship discovers a lost island in the South Pacific

To their surprise, the ship's company find the remains of a shipwreck there, a couple of decades old, and a single survivor, a Welsh mariner who has busied himself building an exact replica of a Welsh village, complete with a town hall, a pub, a rugby pitch, and two chapels.

"...Two chapels?"...

An American, a Dutchman and a Chinese guy

stranded on a deserted island after being shipwrecked. The American immediately takes charge and points to the Dutch: “You should take care of the wood to build a fire”. The Dutchman confirmes and disappears in the woods.

After that, he points to the Chinese: “you should take care of the supp...

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Desert Island Dicks

A man who has been shipwrecked on a desert island for several years is beginning to feel the effects of being starved of sex for so long. However, the only living creatures on the island are a pig and a dog. One day, the man decides he’s had enough and thinks to himself that it has to be the pig. Bu...

Assuming this is funny.....

A physicist , chemist and an economist are shipwrecked. They have retrieved a box full of canned food but they don't have a can opener. The physicist
says "let's determine an angle at which if the can is thrown we can get it opened up"
The chemist chips in "let me think what metal is used to ...

Two men are in a rowboat…

…After being shipwrecked in the middle of the Pacific. The first man looks over to the second and says: “We should paddle to the west. It is the way the ship was going. They’ll probably look for us first over there.”

The second man nods and says: “We could do that, or…”

The first man i...

A magician is working on a Cruise Ship...

With him, he has a parrot to spice up his routine. Sadly, the parrot has the habit of ruining his show.

Whenever the magician makes something disappear, the parrot announces: "Saw it! You palmed it and hid it up your sleeve!"

When he does a card trick, the parrot says: "Saw it! Every ...

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A frenchman, a jew, an american and a canadian…

… get shipwrecked on an island populated by elephants.

The next day, a container washes ashore, containing nothing but paper pads and pencils.

Each one decides to write a book about their experience being shipwrecked.

They live for a year on the island with the elephants where t...

Another deserted island joke...

A chemist, a physicist, and an economist are shipwrecked on a deserted island, with only a book of waterproof matches, a set of flares, and a case of canned soup.

“All we have to eat is this soup,” said the chemist as he set of the first flare. “Let’s set the cans here, near the water, so th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Economist joke, the only one I know and it's lovely

An Economist, a Chemist, and a Physicist are shipwrecked on an island with little food and water. Some canned food washes up and boy are they happy to see it, however, they are pretty upset that they don't have a can opener. The Chemist says, 'hey you know, there are all sorts of chemicals and shit ...

A joke my religion professor told me...

A Dutch Calvinist gets stranded on a deserted island...

He saved his Bible in the shipwreck, so he maintained a prayerful life despite being stranded. The island was full of fruit and wildlife that he could hunt, so he survived well. Every day he swims out to a channel to see if any ships w...

Two men and a woman

Two men and a women became shipwrecked on a small remote island in the Pacific. Every night, the three of them would sleep together. After many nights like this, the woman felt guilty about what she was doing and threw herself off a cliff, killing herself instantly.
After a few weeks, the men fel...

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The Island.

There were three guys shipwrecked on a island and they set out to find some food and water. They reached this giant cliff and they came across a magic lamp and all three of them grabbed on to it and the genie was set loose.

“I can safely assume all three of you want off my island, so run to ...

After years of hard work, an ambitious yuppie books himself on a Caribbean cruise.

He has the time of his life until the boat
sinks and he ends up on a desert island. A month later the man
looks out to sea and sees a gorgeous woman rowing to shore. He
asks her where she’s come from.

"I was shipwrecked last year," she says. "I’ve been stranded on the
other sid...

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three guys are on a deserted island...

Just recently shipwrecked. As they each regain consciousness they realize they are surrounded by cannibals. The cannibals put each man into a bamboo cage and hold them there over night. The next morning the natives hand each man a palm leaf sack and explain to them that they are to gather a single f...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man, a pig and a dog on stranded on a deserted island....

A man, a dog and a pig are stranded on a deserted island after surviving a shipwreck. The man and his animals have plenty of food and resources to survive, but after a while the man starts to feel sexually frustrated.

One day he decides to take his sexual frustration out on the pig but...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Island Rescue

A man, a pig, and a dog are stranded on an island. Over the next few weeks the man grows increasingly horny, and decides to fuck the pig. However, every time the man drops his pants, the dog begins to growl and become very aggressive. Frustrated, he gives up.

One day the man sees something fl...

A young man named Theseus moves to a lakeside fishing village looking for work

When he arrives, he finds one of the residents, Justin, is interested in going out and seeing the world, and wants to sell his fishing boat to fund that trip. Thinking that it might be a good way to make a living, Theseus buys the boat and spends the next few years learning the trade, establishing a...

A marooned Baptist is rescued by a ship.

A Baptist has been stranded on a deserted island for two years. Upon being rescued, a sailor asks: "You survived. Remarkable. How did you do it?"

The Protestant says, "By the grace of God. Come, let me show you where I lived." So the sailors and the castaway retreat into the jungle. ...

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