The 38+ Best Wings Jokes

What do you call a fly with no wings?

A walk

What has two wings and an arrow?

A Chinese telephone!

I was working a job on a boat transporting people and cars when a magical godmother with gossamer wings surprised me with a really good party for me with rides. Then I found out I still had to pay admission. It was only a couple bucks, though.

A Very Fair Fairy Ferry Faire Fare.

Who doesn't like hot wings?

Icarus

What do you call a franciscan monk with wings?

An air friar.

What has two wings but doesn't fly...

Has two eyes but doesn't see, has two legs but doesn't walk?

A dead bird.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I found a butterfly on the ground without wings, so I poured some redbull on it and BAM...

... it drowned

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man is sitting on a flight from NYC to London

He feels a little cold, so he asks the cabin attendant for a blanket. The cabin crew completely ignores him. On the seat next to him is no other than a parrot. The parrot screams "get me a scotch on the rocks you stupid cunt". Not a moment passes and the parrot gets a nice glass of whiskey. The man ...

I like my saviors like I like my chicken wings

Tender and mild

What’s Icarus’ least favorite food?

hot wings

Hooters

Two men grow up together as friends. After college, one moves to Ohio, and the other moves to Colorado. They agree to meet every 10 years in Florida to play some golf and catch up with each other.

At age 35 they meet, finish their round of golf, and head for lunch.

One asks, "...

I know a man who says he designed a labyrinth, got imprisoned in it, and then escaped using wings made of wax.

But I wonder whether he really Daedalus things he claims to have done.

What's got four wheels, no wings, and flies?

A rubbish truck.

A friend of mine bought an old plane, took the wings off, and turned it into a restaurant.

I don’t think it will take off.

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I saw a homeless man with a sign that read “$1 for a dirty joke”

Seemed like a good investment to me so I gladly handed over a dollar.

Homeless man: “Look there, you can see a Rooster right? How many legs does it have?"

Me: “Two?”

Homeless man: “Correct, now how many wings does this Rooster have?”

Me: “Two?”

Homeless man: “Right...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Kung Fu student asks his teacher

"Master, why does my ability not improve? I'm always defeated.

And the master, pensive and forever patient, answers: "My dear pupil, have you seen the gulls flying by the setting sun, and their wings seeming like flames?"

"Yes, my master, I have."

"And a waterfall, spilling m...

I have 600 legs, 30 arms, a pair of wings, and 1000 eyes. What am I?

A liar.

What do you call a fly with no wings?

Still a fly. The irony is unfortunate but the name doesn’t change.

A pig with wings walks into a bar. Stunned, the bartender says

"You can't bring food in here from another restaurant! Even if you are a cop!"

Did you hear that the Great Flying Phoenix decided to get his wings clipped?

Now he just goes by Joaquin Phoenix.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

1 dollar for dirty joke

I was in Venice Beach in January and there was a homeless man with a sign that said “1 dollar for dirty joke.” Seemed like a good investment to me so I gladly handed over a dollar.

Homeless man: “Alright sir whats your name?

Me: “asstasticbum”

Homeless man: “So asstasticbum, the...

Did you hear the one about the Angel that spread her legs instead of her wings....

Got an Organ instead of a harp😬

A woman dies and goes to the afterlife. They tell her:

\- You were a righteous woman in your life. You may go to Heaven, here is the queue.

She joins the queue, starts waiting... suddenly, she hears a horrible scream.

\- What was that? - she asks a nearby angel.

\- Well, a new soul is being converted into an angel, so they drill ho...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Does the flap of a butterfly’s wings in Brazil set off a tornado in Texas?

I don’t know. But I know that a guy eating a pangolin in Wuhan, China can cause a toilet paper shortage in every single American mall

Jim walked into a bar....

Jim, walked into a bar and aggressively shouted his order to the bartender

”Please give me a plate of chicken wings and then give everyone half a kilo steak and mutton, cause when I eat,
I want everyone to eat!”

The bartender complies, by giving Jim a plate of chicken wings and eve...

I saw a bird with broken wings but a resilient look in its eye.

It was unflappable.

What do you call a chicken with no legs and no wings?

A chicken nugget

What has two wings and an arrow?

A Chinese man imitating a phone ringing and answering the call.

"Wing, wing, arrow?"

What’s the difference between you and a guy who dresses up in a toga & wings and shoots arrows at couples on Valentine’s Day

One’s a Cupid Stunt...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Every time a bell rings, an angel gets its wings. But what happens when a Foghorn blows?

I say-I say, you get cum in your mouth

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How do you know that chicken wings aren’t virgins?

Because they are always bone-in

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a restaurant that's owned by a friend of his.

He says to his friend, "How's it going? How's the restaurant business?"

His friend says, "It's going pretty good but I got a chef that won't stop jerking off."

He tells him, "Just fire him."

"I can't. He's an amazing cook. You should try his wings. They are amazing."

"The...

A couple friends and I are opening a chicken wings restaurant called the "Right Wing Cafe."

We don't actually sell any wings, we just complain about other wing places.

What haw two wings and an arrow?

A Chinese telephone.

(I'm Chinese and I give this joke the Chinese stamp of approval)

TIL in 1954 the Detroit Red Wings held an exhibition match against inmates at Marquette prison.

The game had its pros and cons.

What is grey, has wings and is a terrible swimmer?

A castle.

A man came up to me today and said "I've invented an aeroplane without wings"

I thought, that'll never take off

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Everytime someone cuts me off in traffic, an angel gets its wings

Because I'm going to kill a motherfucker.

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