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White people don’t shoot each other in the streets like black people do.

We do it in schools, because we have class.

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Everybody knows there are words only black people can say, but what can only white people say?

"Thanks for the warning, officer."

How many white people does it take to replace a light bulb?

One to hold the bulb, and the rest to screw the whole world.

Why do white people own so many pets?

Because they can’t own people anymore.

Why do the Native Americans hate when white people ask to use their WiFi?

They're taking all their LAN!

Why do white people not like playing uno with mexicans?

They take all the green cards

Why shouldn't white people swim?

Crackers get soggy when wet.

My Chinese waiter thinks all white people look alike and gave my food to the wrong customer

Wait. Never mind. That wasn't my waiter.

Why Aren't There Riots When White People Get Killed?

Because white people have work in the morning.

Why do aliens only abduct white people?

Because they are easier to see in the dark.

Why do Native Americans hate April?

Because April showers bring May Flowers, and Mayflowers bring white people.

Record low temperatures causing snow and freezing all over the southern United States.

Finally: white people in Texas are having problems with ICE.

What do you call a bench full of white people?


What do you call 64 white people in a room?

One full blooded Cherokee

Deep in the Amazon jungle, a tribe witnessed white people for the first time...

...and immediately regretted installing TikTok.

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What's something white people can cook better than black people?

Father's day dinner

They tried to warn us, it's finally happening, minorities herding white people into camps.

Here in Oregon we call them "music festivals"

To anyone who says white people can't jump...

You obviously haven't seen footage of 9/11.

I've figured out why white people hate diversity.

Variety is the spice of life.

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What is a mob of white people running down a hill called?

An Avalanche.

What is a mob of Mexicans running down a hill called?

A Mudslide.

What is a mob of black people running down a hill called?

A Jailbreak.

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Why do black people wear hoodies more than white people?

Black people wear them outdoors, on the streets while white people wear them indoors at their weekly meetings.

They say white people can't jump.

Well, I just got jumped by 3 of them, so I beg to differ.

How many white people does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, they just hire a mexican to do it.

I was at my bank today waiting in a short line.

There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady, who was trying to exchange yen for dollars. It was obvious she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla of yen. Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?" The teller shrugged his shoulder...

I never interfere when two white people fight.

Because it’s already a fair fight.

I don't really see many white people in London nowadays

Mainly because I've never been to London, though.

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So I did some research...

and Chinese people like listening to music on their phones with earbuds, black people like portable speakers, Mexicans prefer cheaper systems in their home with big speakers and white people like higher end but compact systems...

Sorry, I guess I shouldn't be discussing racial stereo types.

I never understood why white people can’t say the n-word

I mean we’re the ones who invented it after all

This guy on the train called me a racist!

I dont even see how although. I mean I am a white guy. I mean white people can't be racist. Racism is a crime and crime is for minorities

Anybody know some white people jokes?

I'm an avid racist and like to have plenty of denigrating jokes at the ready for any particular race. Sadly I know very few targeted at Caucasians, and the ones I do know make them look sorta good (rich, stable, part of ruling elite). Anybody know any jokes that poke fun at being white?

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Why do white people shop from black people's yard sales?

To get their stuff back.

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Why are school shooters more likely to be white people?

White people actually go to school. Black people stay home and shoot people in their own neighborhood.

I need some white people jokes!

I would especially love to hear these from someone of a different race. It's my birthday and this would make it complete.

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White people are always butthurt about MLK day and black history month.

They always say, "It'd be racist of we had a holiday." They don't understand we do.... Fathers Day.

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20 black people, 13 Jewish people, 18 Chinese people, 10 Russians and 26 white people are in a bar...

It's crowded.

Remember when OJ Simpson was found innocent and all of us white people hit the street looting and damaging property?!

Oh, that's right, we didn't...

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