Whack Off Jokes - 5 Hilarious Whack Off Jokes

I can fall asleep really fast after I whack off

It's really come in handy

70% of men whack off in the shower. The rest of them sing. You know what they sing?

...No, I didn't think you did.

You tell me Facebook is toxic

If you’ve got a better way to whack off to your coworkers I’d love to hear it.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Godfather’s relaxing at his social club...

...with his crew. The usual gaggle of young Turks waits in the wings, hoping to get noticed, hoping to move up.

The Godfather calls one of them over.

“Jimmy, I hear good things about you. They tell me you’re serious, that you can be trusted.”

Jimmy swells with pride.

“I ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

"So there's a man in an elevator, and as the doors are closing, he sees this young, fine looking lady hurriedly make her way to the elevator too, so he stops the doors and lets her get on.

'Where are you headed?' he asks, standing by the buttons.

'Oh, I'm going to the clinic on the fourth floor,' the lady says, 'I'm going to go donate some eggs and make a quick hundred dollars.'

At this, the man starts to chuckle.

'What's so funny?'

'Well, it's just that I'...

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