Light Bulb Jokes

They don't, they arrest the bulb for being broke and beat the room for being black.

Only two, but they'll wait 6 or 7 seasons before screwing it up.

Two. One to promise a brighter future and one to screw it up.

None. They just compliment it and then get mad when it won't screw.

Two. One to change the bulb, and the other to give it an unexpected twist at the end.

EDIT: Thank you for the silver!

EDIT AGAIN: Thank you for the gold and platinum! I am honored!

None. They're happy living in the dark

We don’t know. Due to a lack of building regulations, they keep dying from electrocutions.

Just one, but the light has to really want to change.


Give me your best lightbulb joke.

10.

1 to change the bulb and 9 to tell you how much better they could've done it

One. We are efficient and dont have humour.

My life is a joke.

Find out next time, on Dragon Ball Z!

No one knows. They never get to keep the house.

Just one...to call 911 and demand a cop come do something about the intimidating blackness

Monday January 01, 1900

Wanna go ride bikes?

They hold it up to the light and wait for the world to revolve around them

It’s a reeeeaaally obscure number that you’ve probably never heard of

1000 One to change it and 999 to walk into the same room and change the same light bulb without checking to see if it needed changing first.

Actually, the light bulb never gets changed. You were all too busy fixing my grammatical mistake.

It is a trick question, as they are still using gas lighting.

The real question is that who broke the light bulb and why are they keeping us in the dark?

edit.. thanks for the award kind stanger.

Such number as may be deemed necessary to perform the aforementioned task in a timely and efficient manner within the structure in which said bulb is housed and being dependent on the following variables:

Whereas it should be taken in to account that ceiling heights may differ significantly f... read more

One to screw the lightbulb and several others to prevent the spacecraft from spinning in the same direction.

None. They just keep putting the broken one back in because it promised things would be different this time.

I'm asking because mine had to call like six other guys in to help him, and I'm really starting to wonder why I needed one installed down there in the first place.

Such number as may be deemed necessary to perform the stated task in a timely and efficient manner within the strictures of the following agreement: Whereas the party of the first part, also known as "Lawyer", and the party of the second part, also known as "Light Bulb", do hereby and forthwith agre... read more

Paddy and John are working on a building site. Paddy says to John, “I need a day off, I’m going to pretend I’ve gone mad!”

Paddy climbs up to the rafters, hangs upside down from them and shouts, “I’m a light bulb! I’m a light bulb!” While John looks on in amazement.
The foreman shouts, “Pa... read more

A window user, a Linux user and an apple user all need to change a lightbulb in their respective homes. They split up and the windows and apple user meet back up 5 minutes later

Windows User: Did you get it fixed?

Apple user: No, it can't be cganged so I need to find a new house; how a... read more

You can unscrew a lightbulb

5 days. & I’m pretty proud of myself.

2. One to change it and one to sing about how much they miss the old one.

With a TikTok account and some decent photo editing software, only about 4.

30 - One to hold the light bulb and 29 to drink until the room spins.

Don't know, the baby boomer that has the job now can't retire because they never saved anything and millennials all have LED lights that last longer.

Look, we can change the light bulb. That I will tell you. We're changing it, ok? And I understand what you're saying, I hear it all the time. People call me and say "Is the light bulb really dead?". That's what they are asking me, its unbelievable. The light bulb is in big trouble, that I can tell y... read more