Ohm Jokes - 41 Hilarious Ohm Jokes

What's the difference between watts and ohms?

Watts are a unit of electrical energy. Ohms are where British people live.

Why did Mr. Ohm marry Mrs. Ohm?

Because he couldn't resistor...

Happy Dad's Day!

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Schrodinger, Heisenberg and Ohm are all on a road trip...

Schrodinger, Heisenberg and Ohm are all on a roadtrip and they are zooming down a highway on a summer night. Heisenberg is driving, Schrodinger is riding shotgun and Ohm is in the back-seat tinkering with the light. They get pulled over for speeding.

The officer walks over to the driver's si...

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Heisenberg, Schrödinger, and Ohm are on a road trip…

Heisenberg, Schrödinger, and Ohm are on a road trip, and they get pulled over. Heisenberg is driving and the cop asks him, “Do you know how fast you were going?”

“No, but I know exactly where I am” Heisenberg replies.

The cop says “You were going 80 miles an hour.” Heisenberg throws up...

Albert Einstein, Isaac Newton, Werner Heisenberg, Georg Ohm, Galileo Galilei, Max Planck, and Louis de Broglie were carpooling to work...

...when they got pulled over for speeding. However, when the police officer tried to ask them how fast they were going, he couldn't get a straight answer, and the group was so rowdy that they had to be brought in for questioning.

So all 7 of them are taken to the police station, and individua...

An electrician comes home late....

Wife: "Wire you insulate?"

Electrician: "Watts it to you? I'm ohm, aren't I."

I caught my daughter chewing on an electrical cable.

So I had to ground her and kept her at ohm

She's doing better currently .

And conducting herself properly

The country of Ohms is run by a brutal dictator.

Due to the suppression of their rights, the citizens of Ohms frequently rise up and attempt to storm the gates of the capital city. However, the dictator always has just the right number of mercenaries to repel the rebels and cause the survivors to disperse for a few months or so.

The dictat...

Why are monks so good at protesting?

The more ohms you have, the greater the resistance.

Einstein, Newton and Pascal decide to play hide and seek.

Einstein is it, closes his eyes, counts to 10 then opens them.

Pascal is no where to be seen. Newton is sitting right in front of Einstein, with a piece of chalk in his hand. He’s sitting in a square drawn on the ground, a meter to a side.

Einstein says “Newton, you’re terrible, I’ve f...

Remember that time Ohm got drunk at a Communist convention?

He made a long-winded speech about the dielectric.

What do you call Ohm wearing sunglasses?

Cool-Ohm

How does Ohm conduct an orchestra?

Standing on his head!

Glad to see my Buddhist friends join and chant in the protests

Everyone knows the more Ohms- the greater the resistance.

If you think you wrote a great letter, add a footnote at the end which explains Ohm’s Law.

Then it’ll be your P.S. de resistance.

Where do electricians go when their job is done?

They go h-ohm.

Why did the ohm swim to the other side of the river?

Because there was too much resistance.

Ohm's Girlfriend was a vixen

He couldn't resistor

(Ω_Ω) for those moments, when you go..

"ohm eye God"

Best dad joke I ever came up with: What do you call a resistor that doesn't work?

Ohm-less

Why should you always rent, rather than buy, a multimeter that measures ohms?

Because it's easier to follow the path of leased resistance.

I was gifted a resistor by an old monk

So far, I haven't been able to use it in any circuits due to it's abnormally high resistance. Too mamy ohms.

I had a party for the worlds greatest historical figures, here are their RSVPs

Isaac Newton: "I'll drop in."

Socrates: "I'll think about it."

Charles Darwin: "I'll wait to see what evolves."

Marie Curie: "I am radiating enthusiasm."

Ivan Pavlov: "I'm positively drooling at the thought."

Albert Einstein: "It will ...

What do you say when you break up with an electrician?

Watt is love?

Baby don't hertz me.

Don't hertz me.

N-ohm-ore.

N-ohm-ore.

Someone should make an electronics shop that sells resistors and call it:

The Ohm Depot

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I got spurred on to nerdy physics jokes a few minutes ago and remembered this one time my good friend told me about a heated sexual encounter he had once....

One evening, with his charge at full capacity, Micro Farad decided to get a cute coil to discharge him. He went to the Magnet Bar to pick up a chip called Millie Amp. He caught her out back trying self induction; fortunately, she had not damaged her solenoid. The two took off on his megacycle and ro...

What is a resistors favorite breakfast?

An Ohm-let

What do you call when you cross a detective with an electrician

Sherlock Ohms

(sorry if this is repost, I thought of it in class)

I fell in love with a female electrician

She was a real live wire and i took her ohm with me

Did you know?

According to Ohm's law, the best way to get an answer is to post an incorrect answer online, and someone will eventually correct you.

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My favorite joke I'm sure you've heard it before.

So Heisenberg, Schrodinger, and Ohm are in a car driving down the freeway when a cop pulls them over. The cop comes to the window and asks,

"Do you know how fast you were going?"

Heisenberg replies, "No but I know exactly where I am."

"You were doing 120mph in a 60mph zone!" Say...

I robbed an ohmless man last night.

There was no resistance

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Did you hear about the cockney hobo who offered no resistance to electrical current?

He was ohm-less.

What social media site does an electrician use

Ohmegle

What do you call a physicist that’s 1/4 Hispanic?

Ohm slice

Meditation

Why does meditation get so much resistance?

Because there's too many Ohms.

What did the resistor say to the capacitor after he beat him in a game?

I ohmed you!

(my 10 year came up with this when I was teaching him soldering)

What did the monks chant during the electric boogie danceoff?

Ohm.

Where do electricians get supplies?

The Ohm Depot.

What happened to the super-conductor when he lost his job?

He was made ‘ohm-less’

What do you call an electrical engineer trying to solve an issue?

Sherlock Ohms

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