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Niagara Falls...

But never sinks!

If Americans in Niagara Falls want to get to Canada for legal marijuana...

They have to take the 420 Highway!

(It’s actually true. Look it up.)

real dad joke at Niagara Falls

We did a tour behind the Falls in Niagara. We were leaving the tour and going up the elevator:

Elevator Operator: is this your first time?

Me: no I've been on many elevators.

I drove past a billboard promoting Niagara Falls as the tallest waterfall in the world...

Turns out it was falls advertising.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between Niagara and Viagra?

Niagara falls.

My father promised me he would take me to Niagara Falls and then canceled

It was a Falls promise! :(

Probably, anyway.

A family was standing on the Canadian side of Niagara Falls, looking out at the raging water.

"Look, daughter!" The Mom said. "Did you know on this side of the Falls is one country, and the other side of the Falls is a different country?"

"Really?" said the daughter, amazed.


Niagara Falls

A guide was showing Niagara-Falls to a man from Texas and said; I’ll bet you don’t have anything like this in Texas.
The Texan said; nope, but in Texas we have plumbers who can fix it.

Magnificent Niagara

I recently had a visitor from the state of Texas. For three days all I heard from him was... "In Texas we have the best this, the largest that, the fastest that, etc. etc.' It eventually became very annoying.

I am from Niagara Falls and I thought I could outdo him by showing him the "Magn...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What does crossing the Niagara on a tightrope and being given a blowjob by a 90-year old have in common?

You don't want to look down

A man is in the middle of his eye exam.

It seems to be going well until the doctor asks him to cover one eye and read words off a board.

The doctor asks, “What does this say?”

The man says, “That’s easy enough. I.”

The doctor points at the next line.

“That says Am.”

The doctor points at the next line, an...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Viagra pill for woman has just been released onto the market.

It's called Niagara.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between the Canadian-American border and a performance enhancing drug?

Niagara Falls, Viagra rises.

A joke I heard from Walter Matthau

Three old men are talking and the first old man goes “if I could do a good number 1 , just a number one for three seconds I’d be happy with myself”

The second goes “if I could do a solid number 2, just a quick, swift number 2 I’d be satisfied”

The third guy goes “well I do an awesome n...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Viagra for women.

The makers of Viagra have developed a pill for women that unlike Viagra that keeps a man erect for hours, this pill keeps a woman lubricating constantly for four hours. They're calling it Niagara.

An engineer creates the smartest AI in the world

An engineer creates the smartest AI in the world.
To test it he lets his nephew try it. The boy asks "Where is my father?"

After a couple of seconds the computer answers "Your father is at the Niagara Falls with a friend"

The kid turns to his uncle and says
"Uncle, this compu...

How many Canadians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Twelve. Four to form a Parliamentary study committee to decide how to solve the problem, one Francophone to complain that I didn't translate this joke into French, one Native Canadian to protest that the interests of Native Canadians have been overlooked, one woman from the National Action Committee...

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