Body Of Water Jokes - 26 Hilarious Body Of Water Jokes

Have you heard Justin Timberlake's hit song about his favorite Ukrainian body of water?

The Crimea River

What is the smallest body of water in the South?

The gene pool.

What's the most sarcastic body of water on earth?

The Crimea River.

I’ve always dreamed of swimming in a body of water filled with soda.

Sadly it’s just a Fanta-sea.

What do you call a body of water that won’t follow its own rules?

The Hypocri Sea

Which large body of water is the most envious?

The Jealousy

Which body of water always gives the exact details?

The Specific Ocean.

What’s another name for a noisy body of water?

A creek

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What did one body of water say to another?

Nothing, they can't fucking speak.

What body of water is full of testicular mites?

The Baltic Sea.

What do you call a large body of water that's made of money?

A currensea.

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Donald Trump, Vladimr Putin and Angela Merkel take a walk on the Beach.

Seeing the great body of water, Mr Trump felt the need to reassure the two others of his country's militaristic superiority.

"Folks, I can tell you, our Navy submarines, are so big and so good, would you believe it, they can remain submerged from the moment they leave the port, to the day the...

What body of water is used for writing?

The Apostrosea.

What body of water separates Italy from the word 'goodbye'?

River Derci. Sorry.

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In what body of water did Hitler keep his string?

The Knot seas

Bring on the downvotes!

I’m in Britain and I have a friend in America. He keeps telling me he identifies as a large body of water.

He’s transatlantic.

HELP: Trying to write a joke

I hope this doesn't go against any sub rules. I'm ok if it gets deleted.

So, I had an idea pop into my head last night, and I need some help in fleshing out the body of the joke.

It would go something like this:

A man and his son are walking near (body of water) on Christmas Day...

What do you call it when people try to make you to build a a platform supported on pillars or girders leading out from the shore into a body of water, used as a landing stage for boats even though you don’t want to?

Pier pressure

Two Irishman were fishing on a lake...

...when one of them caught a mysterious, ancient-looking bottle. Upon taking the bottle off the line, a genie popped out of it and said, "I really don't have time for this three wishes nonsense. You get one wish between the two of you, so make it good."

The fisherman who caught the bottle imm...

A man goes hiking

He brings with him a backpack with a water pouch for easy hydration and, as a back-up, a metal straw that had a filter so he could drink from any body of water he wanted.

After a couple of hours he realizes that he is already out of water. Being the conservative drinker he was, he figured...

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It is the year 2200

In a small city lived a master fisherman. This fisherman was famous throughout the world for being able to catch numerous amounts of fish in any body of water. Now, fish these days have mutated and changed quite a bit, but this fisherman was able to catch them all with little to no effort.

On...

How do fish describe being caught and released?

An out of body of water experience.

Misunderstood JT

In the early 2000s Justin Timberlake did a tour in Eastern Europe and had a stop in southern Ukraine.

After playing a show in Sevastopol he had some down time so he travelled the countryside, and was amazed by the stunning beauty of the peninsula's nature and wildlife. He backpacked through ...

A well-dressed city slicker breaks down on a country road...

His cellphone is dead, but a kindly farmer tells him he can use the landline in his farmhouse, a few hundred yards back from the road.

The traveller strides hurriedly across the farmer's field in advance of the farmer, but hesitates as he draws near a broad body of water, and turns back to lo...

An Englishman, an American and a Dutchman found a genie in an ancient tomb.

"BEHOLD MORTALS!" the genie bellowed. "I SHALL GRANT YOU IMMORTAL LIFE!"

Immediately, all three men are excited.

"But, dear chap, there must be a catch!" the Englishman yelled.

"Of course! You must beat me in a contest. You may throw anything, no matter how large or how small i...

There once was a man

There once was a man - an old man - weathered and weary from spending the past 60 years of his life as a man of the sea.

He had survived it all: war, weather, business. He had seen just about every major body of water known to man. The seven seas, the fours oceans, the great lakes and nearly ...

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