This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I recently traveled through time to hook-up with Queen Victoria, the famous nympho-queen of England in the late 1800's.

I was stunned to find out that she wanted me adorned in the latest fashions before we consummated our tri-millenium tryst. She made me wait until I grew large mutton-chop side-burns and a moustache. It took like three weeks. Meanwhile, she had a high fastening and tight fitting frock coat cut to ...

Victoria's Secret has launched a revolutionary new bra, "Croatia"

..it has lot's of support but no cup

A guy goes to Victoria's Secret to buy a babydoll... the cashier asks him if it is a surprise for his wife and he said...

it will be if she finds out!

A husband walks into Victoria 's Secret to purchase a sheer negligee for his wife.

He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price -- the more sheer, the higher the price. Naturally, he opts for the most sheer item, pays the $500, and takes it home. He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on, and model it for him. Upstairs the wife th...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I like my women like I like my cheesecake

Without someone else’s dick in it you fuckin bitch Victoria

I know Victoria's Secret...

She used to be Victor

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

What did Queen Victoria say when she orgasmed for the first time?

We have arrived

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Had my identity stolen by a rhino once. Had a bunch of purchases from Victoria Secret.

Guess he was horny.

Why are singers not nervous during Victoria’s Secret performances?

It’s easy to picture everybody with their clothes off

A man is shopping for lingerie at a Victoria’s Secret for his wife on Valentine’s day...

When looking around, he notices that as the prices of the lingerie go up, so does the skimpiness and how see-thru the fabric is. The most expensive item is $500.

Being in a good mood, the man decides to purchase the most expensive item.

He heads home to meet his wife and show her his...

What is one thing a guy should never say in Victoria’s Secret?

Does this come in children’s sizes?

You see that movie about Queen Victoria's first menstrual cycle?

I thought it was bloody good and I normally don't care for period dramas.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

The CEO of Victoria's Secret resigned today.

Apparently, the company is going tits up.

I figured out what Victoria’s Secret is!!!!!

..... it’s foam :/

For someone who's name is Amanda Victoria

A nickname is Manda Tory

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Today i was offered sex with a Victoria secret model...

in exchange for that i was supposed to promote some sort of cleaner on my Reddit page.

Of course i declined as i am a person of high moral standard and strong willpower.

Nearly as strong as Ajax, the incredibly strong bathroom cleaner, now available in lemon scent and vanilla.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

What do Queen Victoria's empire and people with innie bellybuttons have in common?

Navel superiority.

Last night was horrible, my wife suddenly died so I had to whack off to a Victoria’s Secret catalog.

Edit (spelling): wifi

I walked into a Victoria's Secret a man and came out a knight.

From this day forward I shall be known as Sir- please leave you're being creepy.

In Victoria Secret shop...

sir can i help you?
yes...does this come in children sizes?😐

Starbucks or Victoria Secrets?.....

Who charges more per cup?

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Petition to replace Ellen Pao with Victoria Taylor.

No joke.

Its a popular coup necessary to save Reddit from its current state of gross mismanagement.

(Also, did Jessie Jackson and the grotesque scaredy cat race baiting and fake Nazi-progressive politics of this Age get Victoria fired?)

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Victoria's Secret recently invented a bra that contains Bluetooth speakers ...

... because so many women had complained that men stare at their breasts instead of listening to them.

What does a Victoria's Secret Black Friday sale have in common with a girl about to get a spanking?

Both have panties half-off.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Why Victoria Got Fired

Victoria calls in to work and says, "Hey, boss I can't come to work today. I'm really sick. I have a headache, stomachache and my legs hurt. I can not come to work."

Pao says, "You know Victoria, I really need you today. When I feel like this I go to my husband and tell him to give me sex. Ma...

What did Victoria say to Vancouver?

I'll BC-ing you later.

Who discovered Victoria Falls?

Whoever tripped her.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Victoria Beckham got her twat shaved.

He still looks ridiculous.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Did you hear Victoria entered a boxing tournament where the grand prize was a sex change?

I heard she came out the Victor

Asked my grandfather if he had anything equivalent to Victoria's Secret when he was young

He said "No, we had morals."

What did Reddit almost change their name to during the Victoria controversy?

Blueit.



-just thought of it, sorry its a little late to the party

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Two women go on a night out...

Two women, Mary and Margaret, go on a night out, leaving their husbands at home. After a heavy night of Guinness, and while walking home through a large cemetery they both have a strong urge to relieve themselves. They each pop a squat behind a bush, and after doing the deed Mary calls over "psssst,...

What's the difference between Victoria Taylor and Arnold Schwarzenegger?

One was fired, the other was terminated

When the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show comes on the TV.

So do I.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Two drunk girls stop to pee in a cemetery

Two drunk girls stopped to pee in a cemetery after a long night out drinking and partying.

The first girl squats down by the car and starts to pee. She then realizes she doesn't have anything to wipe with, so she takes her panties off and wipes herself, and throws them away.

The secon...

A kindly old man is walking by the seaside when he sees three lovely young ladies crying their eyes out.

So he says, "Dear me, you poor things, so miserable on such a lovely day as this! Come and have a cup of tea and let's see if we can't make you feel better."

Won over by his twinkly-eyed charm, the three young ladies manage to dry their eyes and they follow him to a chintzy little seaside c...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A bank robber and her husband were being chased by the police

A bank robber and her husband were being chased by the police

In order to shake off the heat, the couple rushed into a Victoria's secret to blend in with the crowd and hide.

By the time two officers had shown up, the weird looks and perfume that everyone was berating them with were inc...

Being seduced by the younger sister

So apparently this guy was engaged to a beautiful woman. He got along well with her family but he could not deny that her younger sister was drop-dead gorgeous and he felt a strong attraction to her. A week before the wedding, he gets a mysterious phone call from the sister asking him to come over...

A British Gentleman visits India..

He landed in the state of West Bengal, the former seat of the East Indian Company.

Dressed in classic gentlemanly fashion he decided to start the tour by visiting the famed Victoria Memorium Hall. Taken aback by the marvellous architecture, he stopped the nearest passerby and asked, "Who mad...

I bought a trash compactor for my ex-wife

Or, as Victoria Secret calls it - a corset

David Beckham decides to go horse riding

Although he has had no previous experience he skillfully mounts the horse and appears in complete command of the situation as the horse gallops along at a steady pace, Victoria admiringly watching her husband.

After a short time David becomes a little casual and he begins to lose his grip in...

Posh & Becks were in a cab in NY

Posh & Becks caught a cab outside JFK airport after a long flight from London and the cabbie was delighted when he realised who it was.
"You're David Beckham!" he exclaimed "Nice to meet you!"
"Thanks" said David "nice to meet you too".
During the ride the converstation turned to ...

A Tourist is Trudging Through Australia's Desert

A tourist is trudging through Australia’s Great Victoria Desert. …

He’s completely lost, and he’s quickly running out of water. His vision is rather impaired, and he can tell that he’s only got a few more hours before he’ll pass out.

Suddenly, he accidentally steps on a rattlesnake! Be...

David Beckham is out shopping one day.. (Old)

He spots a tall, cylindrical silver thing. He asks a shop assistant what it is; "It's a Thermos flask, it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold" replies the assistant.

So David buys it. On arriving home, Victoria asks what he's
got there. "It's a Thermos flask, keeps 'ot fings 'ot an...

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead stumble across a magic mirror

The trio spot a sign next to it reading "Whatever ye think you are, shall come true!"

The group are excited, and the brunette offers to go first.

She steps up to the mirror and says "I think I am the prettiest person in the world!" she immediately gets a call, and after answering, scr...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I am truly perplexed that so many people are against mosques being built.

I think it should be the goal of every Western Society to be tolerant regardless of their religious beliefs. Thus mosques should be allowed, in an effort to promote tolerance.

That is why I also propose that two nightclubs be opened next door to the mosque, thereby promoting tolerance from w...

A man and his girlfriend were walking down the street...

as they're crossing the street they get hit by a drunk driver.

In a blinding flash, the girlfriend finds herself standing in front of the Pearly Gates and is greeted by St. Peter

"Welcome to Heaven, Victoria, follow me!"

But before she moved a step she frantically asked the Sai...

Why is history called His story?

Because it's written by the Victors, not the Victorias.

Incredible Story of Dr. Davis and an Elephant

In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Victoria University.

On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully.

He got down on one k...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

One day, a kid heard her parents arguing.

She heard them yelling out bitch and bastard a couple of times. The kid intervened and asked them what does bitches and bastards mean. The mom said those words mean ladies and gentlemen.
A week later, the kid was watching TV with her dad. Later, a Victoria's Secret commercial came on, uttering th...