UPJOKE
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Irrelevant Jokes

If Pingu asks an irrelevant question...

Is it a Noot point?

Do you know what they say about irrelevant people?

Not much

In my math class I feel so irrelevant.

It's like I'm not counting.

What do you say when you're in a video conference, and say something completely irrelevant?



Oh sorry: I was on moot.

Radio One has banned its DJs from playing Madonna songs, saying that at 56 she is old and irrelevant.

Yeah, at the BBC they only like them young.

'Time is certainly a very complex topic in physics, and there are people who believe that time does not actually exist. One common argument they use is that Einstein proved that everything is relative, so time is irrelevant'.

I said boldly to my boss! But he still fired me for being 3 hours late.

What do we want?

Crowd: TIME TRAVEL!

When do we want it?

Crowd: THAT’S IRRELEVANT!

I'll never forget my son's 856th words.

"Dad, you capture irrelevant information."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A friend recently asked me if i'd rather have an orgasm each time I hear All Star by Smash Mouth, or hear said song each time I have an orgasm.

I told them the choice is irrelevant as I already do both. Not even sorry.

I would make a Ricegum joke

But it would probably be irrelevant

A group of protesters gather outside a physics lab

"What do we want?"

"Time travel"

"When do we want it?"

"Irrelevant"

How many blood hungry vampires does it take to dress a wound?

The answer's irrelevant as they all suck at it anyway.

Everyday is a good day to walk through the forest,

The fact that im dragging a dead body is completely irrelevant

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Things I've learned from video games

My mother has been fucked to death many times.

I'm really a cigarette in disguise.

I'm also actually of African descent, my father will be very upset to find that one out. Though my real father is probably one of those random people who fucked her to death.

A lot of people are m...

Ten Science Jokes for Nerds

* I’m reading a great book on anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.

* I have a new theory on inertia but it doesn’t seem to be gaining momentum.

* Why can’t atheists solve exponential equations? Because they don’t believe in higher powers.

* Schrodinger’s cat walks into a bar. And ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Martian Sex

For an experiment on the effects of deep space travel on romantic relationships, NASA sends a married couple to explore Mars.

After the couple lands on Mars they begin exploring the surface. To their surprise they bump into a pair of Martians. The Martians looked just humans, except they're g...

Google - Boy or Girl?

Teacher : Google is a girl or a boy..?
..
..
..
Student: Google is a Girl.....because it won't let you complete
the whole sentence and start guessing, suggesting.....and
you ask only one question.....
but get hundreds of irrelevant answers in seconds...

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