People said that I have irrational fear of lies.

Bu I'm afraid that is not true

I've always had an irrational fear of speed bumps.

But I'm slowly getting over it.

I have an irrational fear of overly engineered buildings

A complex complex complex

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Therapist: What seems to be the problem?

Me: I have an irrational fear of those gas station slushies, y'know the ones you get for a dollar?

Therapist: I see.

Me: *Screams.*

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A man is told by a friend that he needs to seek some help for his irrational fear

So he goes to see a new therapist. The therapist asks the man what his fear is. The man responds:

"I am afraid of the Backstreet Boys"


The Therapist then responds:


"Tell me why"

I have this wierd irrational fear of two letter words.

I get extremely scared just thinking about it.

I used to get irrationally angry at ice cubes and throw them onto the floor.

But now it's just water under the fridge.

My irrational fear of moving stairs seems to be getting worse.

You might say it’s… escalating.

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I was talking to my therapist about my irrational fear of letters.

Me: So, I'm afraid of random letters...

Therapist: You are?

Me: *Screams*

Therapist: Oh, I see...

Me: *Screaming intensifies*

I've developed an irrational fear of escalators.

I always find myself taking steps to avoid them.

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Patient: I have an irrational fear of the Backstreet Boys

Therapist: tell me why


Patient: AHHHHHHHH

I have an irrational fear of warrior princesses from different places.

You could say I'm xenaphobic

I know its irrational, but...

Man, do I love pi.

Random Joke

So I was doing my math homework and I thought of a joke. You might only get it if you have learned about pi in math. Here it is:

So one day I became afraid of π. π is an irrational number so does that mean I need to go to the doctor because I have an irrational fear?

Whoever named the irrational fear of long words,

didn't have hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia.

A scientist built a robot but unbeknownst to him, the battery was damaged.

The only way to fix the battery was to sprinkle it with sodium chloride. Some chemical reaction with the combination of battery acid and sodium chloride caused the robot to act highly irrationally and attack the scientist, at which point the robot had to be detained by police.

The robot was c...

Mathematician: Doctor, I have a fear of the irrational

Doctor: Don't worry mate, all the things u worry about are just imaginary

Mathematician: That makes it even worse!

I don't see why some people use fractions instead of decimals

It's pointless, but anyway you gotta draw the line somewhere or else people will think you're being irrational. But that's beside the point

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I went to see the doctor about my irrational fear of palindromes.

Bastard prescribed Xanax.

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A parachutist is about to drop from a plane tommorow as part of a military excercise..

His mother calls him at midnight and with terror in her voice she says:
Do not go tommorow!! I saw a terrible dream, your parachute was not working and you were killed!! Please dont do it!!!
The soldier was terrified about his mothers dream but he still got into the plane. As the persons where...

What do you call an irrational snake?

A πthon

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I realize i have an irrational fear of rats.

I didn't realize there would be so much wildlife in this city.One late night I was walking past this huge pile of garbage.Inside one of the trash bags there was a lot of movement.Really aggressive.It was starting to scare the shit out of me.My only thought was,"Oh God,I hope it's a baby.Please,plea...

My friend is blindly in love with pie.

I don't what to do with his irrational relations.

Pi day may be irrational....

But at least it is real.

Have you heard about the man with an irrational fear of empty spaces?

Nothing scares him

My best friend told me he was planning on naming his son "Square Root of 2".

Luckily his wife managed to convince him that would be completely irrational.

I think my favorite Thanksgiving food is pie,

but some people say that’s irrational.

A math joke my teacher told me on Friday

A: I don't understand why people use fractions, they are pointless.
B: I mean... I like them, but you gotta know where to draw the line or people will think that you're irrational.
A: I still don't see the point I using them.

[OC?I just heard that superstar Phil Collins has an irrational fear of eating an inauthentic Vietnamese noodle dish.

He calls it faux-pho-phobia.

What's another name for an irrational fear of clowns?

Common sense.

I'm going to start a blog for irrational numbers...

I think I'll call it the 3.1 forums...

I made an irrational decision today...

I went to a pi eating contest. It never stops.

My girlfriend is like Pi.

Completely irrational.

I have an irrational fear of elevators

I always feel like they are going to let me down someday.

Why was the square root of 2 punished?

Because it made irrational decisions.

‌‌I lik‌‌e m‌‌y wome‌‌n lik‌‌e ‌‌I lik‌‌e m‌‌y mathematica‌‌l constants.

Roun‌‌d an‌‌d irrational.

Should I beat my kids?

I know I'm not supposed to, but they just make me so frustrated

My wife says I'm being irrational and getting wound up over nothing, and that if I beat them she'll be incredibly upset and won't even know what to say to me.

But you know when it's just the same stuff day in, day out. And...

I have a fear of numbers which aren't the ratio of two integers.

It's really irrational.

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What's the best name for the groups of armed anti-stay-at-home protesters?

Vanilla Isis

Flu Klux Klan

Lack Panthers

HamAss

Meal Team Six

Gravy Seals

Irrational Guard

Y'all Qaeda

Branch Covidians

Boko Moron

The Coughedaracy

101st Chairborne

Cosplaytriots

The Yeehadis

Hogan's Ze...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

We all know why 6 was afraid of 7, but why was it scared of Pi?

Because Pi is fucking irrational.

5 Jokes About Pi

1. Divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter and what do you get?
Pumpkin Pi

2. I saw a movie and gave it a 3.1415 out of 5.
It was Life of Pi

3. My friend decided to get a tattoo of the symbol pi on his face.
It was an irrational decision

4. Who was the r...

You've heard of Friday the 13th...

But what about the next day?
Pi Day the 14th: Irrational Fear

My wife wanted shoes for $1000π

But I refuse to spend irrational amounts on clothing

Why did the √2 tell everyone the world is flat?

'Cause it's irrational!

All of my girlfriends can be divided up like numbers. You mean like sixes, eights and tens?

No. Imaginary, irrational or both.

My teacher is like 5 but square rooted.

So irrational.

My wife sat down with half a pie before dinner.

Me: Are you really planning to eat pie before dinner?

Her: Its only half a pie.

Me: Its still irrational.

10 Ways To Insult Your Friends With Math

10. You're obtuse.

9. You're not normal.

8. You're so negative.

7. You're not natural.

6. You're irrational.

5. You're odd.

4. You're past your prime.

2. You're such a square.

1. What friends? They are all ***i***maginary!

My friends, like numbers, fall into two categories

Odd and even?

No... imaginary and irrational.

A: Hey, How do you manage to stay cool all the time?

B: I don’t get into arguments with stupid people. I just cut it short and say, “You’re right.”
A: But that’s completely irrational and wrong!
B: You’re right.

Why does the FCC Chairman have the last name "Pai"?

Because he is irrational...

A mathematician walks into a bar and says "I want √2 beers"

The bartender tells him "You're being irrational"

A friend has a fear of pi.

I keep telling him it's irrational, but he doesn't listen.

How is number π like the Bible?

Both are believed to contain all the wisdom mankind will ever have.

Most people think that one of them has a proven value. While the other is irrational.

A Statistician Refuses to Fly

His friend asks him, "Why do you have this irrational fear of flying?"

"Irrational?" the statistician replies, "Not at all. I've merely calculated the odds of a bomb being placed on a plane and it's much too high for my comfort."

A few days later, the friend boarded a flight only to ...

A math professor is trapped on a deserted island with nothing but a pie

He decides to ration the pie so he can survive for a month, and hopefully someone will have come by then.

He dies a week later cause he ate all the pie in one day.

He should’ve listened to what he told his students

“Pi is irrational”

I was going to bake a pie in honor of today.

But it would be irrational.

You know what they say about Pi Day...

It really is an irrational holiday.

Contender for the worst pun ever (OC)

Meet Desmond. Desmond and his Father are pretty normal people, but they both have Podophobia, the irrational fear of feet.

One day, they both travel to do a tour of Southeast Asia and visit a family friend. As they’re walking about a city, Desmond see‘s a homeless person begging in shabby cl...

Gas should cost π/gallon.

Since the price is irrational.

What did the Pie say when he failed a math test?

"How did I get these simple questions wrong! I am so irrational!"

For some reason, my friend is afraid of fractions.

It's a completely irrational fear.

Why does nobody talks to pi?

He's irrational and he goes on forever..

Did you know that in ancient Greece, Hippasus was exiled for discovering that some numbers could not be described with simple whole numbers or fractions?

How irrational.

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I get seriously pissed off when my professor brings up π.

I know, it's irrational.

Women are like numbers ...

* Some are Rational, but infinitely more are Irrational.

* The Real ones might be Proper or Improper, but only the Imaginary ones are ever Pure.

* Some are Natural, the rest are Negative, or just not there.

* Some are Prime, but those are hard to find.

* Every other one i...

My friend decided to get a tattoo of Pi on his face.

It was an irrational decision.

Fear of hospitals

Fear of hospitals isn't irrational. I went to 1 once for stomach pain and I had a kid following me ever since calling me mom!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Babe, my sex drive is like Donald Trump's twitter...

Random, irrational, and provocative.

C'mon, guys. Let's stop talking about pi day.

Its getting irrational.

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