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Tool Shed Jokes

My friend was showing me his tool shed.

He pointed to a ladder.
"That's my step ladder," he said.


"I never met my real ladder."

There was a construction site

There’s 3 labourers, ready for their morning job.
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Chinese man.

The boss tells the Englishman, when I get back from lunch, I want this pile of dirt moved over there further.

To the Irishman, after he’s moved it, you need to spread the soil.

To ...

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Southern Woman

A Southern wife came home just in time to find her husband in bed with another woman. With super-human strength, borne of fury and cutting firewood power, she dragged him by the willy down the stairs, out the back door, and into the tool shed out back of the barn. She put his hoo-ha in a vice, then ...

A man and his son run a carpentry business out in the countryside…

They do small jobs here and there, mostly on farms and ranches, fixing up barns and building pens for farm animals. The father eventually wants his son to take over the business and has tried to teach him the ins and outs of woodworking, along with other important lessons he thinks that every carpen...

The great train of Communism grinds to a halt...

Stalin, Khrushchev and Brezhnev are riding on the great train of communism together when it suddenly grinds to a halt.

Stalin pokes his head out of the window and shouts, "Take the engineers behind the tool sheds and have them shot, then get new engineers!" But the train still does not move....

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A guy gets a new job

as a lumberjack deep in the Pacific Northwest. He's been on the job for a while and is starting to feel lonely so he asks the Foreman "Hey, what do guys do up here for ya know, a good time?" The Foreman tells him there is a barrel with a knothole in it behind the tool shed on top of the hill that so...

three men were on a road trip when their car broke down

they walked a mile and found a farm and decided to ask the old farmer if they could crash. the farmer was a kind man and decided to let the men stay, as long as they didn't touch the three hot daughters. later that night none of the men could help themselves and decided to go for it, thinking that t...

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The origins of the ornamental angel atop the Christmas tree

It's almost New Year's Eve and Santa is getting ready to get to work and bring presents to everyone that has been good this year. So there he is at home, taking a shower and preparing for the big night. Opening his closet, he sifts through his clothes and finds his favorite red coat and trousers, bu...

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