"Lincoln" grossed $275,000,000 in movie theaters

Which is ironic since historically Lincoln doesn't do too well in theaters

Why is it so difficult to remodel x-rated theaters?

All the walls are load-bearing.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Norm MacDonald dies and finds himself standing in front of Satan.

"Oh no!!", he says, "Am I in Hell?"

"Yes," replies Satan, "but it's not as bad as you think. I'll show you the joint."

Norm looks around, notices that they are standing in a lush green field, with bountiful fruit trees, and fluffy clouds in an azure sky.

Satan says, "Not bad ri...

What resolution do Mexican movie theaters show movies in?

Por que.

In response to bankruptcy, AMC will open libraries in their theaters

They're calling it paper-view.

Just watched Once Upon A Time In Hollywood in theaters and without knowing anything about it other than the title.

I still don't.

Starting this Thursday, some movie theaters will not allow large bags inside the theater

But thank God I have a few twix up my sleeve

Coming to theaters: the thrilling tale of a man who ate biographical books instead of turkey on Thanksgiving.

Baste on a true story.

What do 85% of movies that don't hit the theaters all have in common?

Nicholas Cage

A man goes to the Optician for his eye test.

The Optician asked him what he can see.
"I see empty airports, empty football grounds, closed theaters and closed pubs."
That's perfect says the Optician, you've got 2020 vision!

Lion king comes to the theaters and

Simba was moving slow so I told him to mufasa

I wanted to go see Malcolm X when it came out in theaters...

But I was afraid wouldn't get it since I hadn't seen 1 through 9

Aspiring thief enters theater

Steals spotlight

I hate theaters

Everything is so staged

Why do so many /r/thedonald users work in movie theaters?

Because they're great at projecting.

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