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Today I learned that your surname denotes your ancestor's occupation like Baker, Mason, or Potter

Someone definitely has to explain why our surname is Dickinson.

A Vietnamese American woman, Christine Nguyen, wanted to preserve her surname.

Christine Nguyen, wanted to keep her surname after marriage, so she resolved to not take on the surname of the man she married, or change her name to a double barrel name that included her family's name.

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Luckily, the man she ended up marrying was also Vietnamese American t...

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Student 1:My name is Sean Archer and my surname represents that my forefathers were Archers

Student 2 : My name is Sarah Baker and my surname represents that my forefathers were Bakers

Student 3 : My name is John Dickinson and I fucking hate this game

My family's surname is depressant, we all share a bleak outlook on life.

Except for my auntie.

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They say English surnames all had a meaning, as in, "Smiths" were blacksmiths and "Taylors" were tailors...

So what the fuck did the Dickinsons do?

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Many surnames come from the job people's ancestors used to have. For example, the Smith family were related to a smith, the Baker family were related to a baker and then there's the Dickinson family...

Who were related to people from Alabama.

A fruit, an insect, and a Chinese surname walk into a bar.

Well, a pear, ant, lee.

I come from a family of scientists who share the surname 'Matter.' We all get along, just like the particles we study.

Except for my Auntie Matter.

Our family surname is “Daniels”

So rather hilariously we named our first child Jack.

She hates it.

They say that a person's surname is named after whatever their ancestors did to make a living

I feel sorry for the guy who's dad was the first person to be called "Dickinson"

I wish my surname was Gasket..

That way when people say things like, "I'm gunna blow a gasket!", I reply with a shrug and say, "Let's do this."

Mr. Tickle proposed to the girl of his dreams… But Tess was reluctant to take his surname.

…but Tess was reluctant to take his surname.

If my surname was 'Case'...

I'd name my son 'Justin'


Just in case.

Social services are talking to a recneck woman about her ten kids...

Social service guy: "ok miss, what's the first boy called?"

Recneck woman: "Billy-Joe"

SS guy: "and the second one?"

RW: "Billy-Joe"

The SS guy pauses for a second and asks "What's the third child called?"

RW: "Billy-Joe"

Ss guy: "hold on... Are ALL your boy...

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A child asks his father about the origins of surnames.

'Well Johnny, you see that surnames originate from the professions. For example, Margaret Thatcher's surname shows that she has the origins of a roof thatcher,' says the father.


'Oh do you have any other names that you could tell me?' pleads little Johnny.


'Well of course there...

A. Schwarzenegger has it long, Brad Pitt short, Madonna does not have it and the Pope does not use it. What is it?

A surname.

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TIL: Many medieval surnames like Fletcher or Cooper refer to the patriarch's traditional occupation.

I guess I won't be marrying Mr. Dickinson.

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Ever wonder where people got their surnames from?

Mr. Baker was probably a baker.

Mr. Butcher might have been a butcher.

...then there's Mr. Dickinson.

Apparently the most common surname In China is Chang.

...correct me if you think that's Wong.

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A female class teacher was having a problem with a boy in her class in Grade 3.

The boy said, "Madam, I should be in Grade 4.
I am smarter than my sister & she's in Grade 4".

The Madam had heard enough and took the boy to the principal.
The principal decided to test the boy with some questions from Grade 4.

**Principal:** What is 3+3?

**Boy:** 6....

Why David shorted his surname to Hoff?

Because it was too much Hassel

A Liverpool girl goes to the welfare office

to register for child benefit.

"How many children?" asks the welfare officer.

"Ten" replies the Liverpool girl,

"Ten?" says the welfare worker. "What are their names?"

"Nathan, Nathan, Nathan, Nathan, Nathan,Nathan, Nathan, Nathan, Nathan and Nathan" replies the...

What does a Polish husband give his new wife that's long and hard?

His surname.

An original.

The casting of the movie Grease was a slow process. They'd soon found their Sandy in Olivia Newton-John, but they just couldn't find someone to play Danny.

After weeks of Olivia reading lines with various actors and failing to have any chemistry with them the movie looked like it could be a f...

Marriage ceremonies are a lot shorter in Texas

Because the wife doesn't have to change her surname.

I once dated a Welsh girl with 36 DDs.

Longest surname I've ever seen.

Mother of The Year

So a reporter for *The Kansas City Star* goes all the way down into rural Arkansas to do a feature on a single mother with twelve sons.

As they sit on the porch sipping lemon tea and smoking Camels, the mother hears a shout. She yells, "Harold, you leave your brother alone!"

Then as a ...

A Chinese couple emegrated to America...

When Mr. & Mrs. Wong had twin boys they wanted to name them after two great Americans and since Mr. Wong had always been fascinated with aviation he decided to name them Oreville and Wilbur Wright. When told them that they couldn't give them a surname other than their own, they took the case to ...

A man cant get something out of his eye...

So he goes to the doctor. He tells about his problem to the receptionist and she writes "Strange body lodged in eye", and tells him to wait. She takes the charts to the doctor and the man goes to sit somewhere else. A few minutes go by, and the doctor comes out. He reads the chart and screams:
...

German tourist crosses Polish border

German tourist crosses Polish border. Border guards ask him:

-Name?

-Hans

-Surname?

-Schmidt

-Occupation?

-No, just traveling.

A woman walks into the Social Worker's office, trailed by 15 kids

WOW, the social worker exclaims, Are they ALL yours?

Yeah they're all mine, the flustered mother sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before. She says, Sit down Terry. All the children rush to find seats.

Well, says the social worker, 'then you must be here to sign up. I'...