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Slowing Jokes

Everyone really needs to start slowing down when doing things.

Right now isn't a great time to be Russian.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The old gunfighter is getting worried

He feels that as he is getting older he is slowing down, and some of the youngsters are getting damn good. He decides he will consult a “gunfighter trainer” to help him improve his technique and show him the latest tricks.

He goes into the bar, and walks up to the gunfighter trainer at a t...

The unusual camel

A man is walking through the desert. He's been lost for a while and he's kinda losing hope.

Behind a sand dune he sees what looks like a camel rental shop. Clearly a mirage.. or is it?

It doesn't disappear as he gets closer so he enters the main tent and is greeted by the owner.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A newlywed couple was driving in the country…

As they’re driving along, the wife starts getting horny. She starts flirting with her husband and he starts getting horny. They both agree they have to have it RIGHT NOW. Being out in the country, out in the middle of nowhere to say little of being miles and miles from home, the husband pulls the ca...

Two old men are in a car

The first man notices the car is approaching an intersection with red lights, but his friend doesn’t seem to be slowing down. He gets tenser and tenser, sweat starts dripping down his back before the car zooms through the intersection at full speed.

A few minutes later, the same thing happen...

I'm getting pretty old and I can feel myself slowing down, so I made a bucket list:

1) Change the "b" to an "f"

(-Jerry Seinfeld, sort of)

Two guys are playing golf. Two women in front of them are really taking their time and are slowing the men up.

One man says to his friend, “I’m gonna go ask those ladies if we can play through.”



He starts walking, but about halfway there, he turns around. When he gets back, his friend asks what happened.



He replies, “One of those women is my wife, and the other is my mistress. W...

There once was a town out west...

There once was a small town out west, nestled between the Rocky Mountains. The town was built on a stream, with a small lake the stream snaked outward from. Most of the town was employed by multiple large orchards nearby, and the town's inhabitants spent their days at the lake enjoying their time of...

Three men are talking in a Soviet gulag.

One of them asks the two others: "So what did you do?"

The first one answers: "Well, I arrived late at the factory, and so they accused me of slowing down the Revolution and the victory of the Proletariat."

The second one answers: "Well, I arrived early at the factory, and so they accu...

This musician kept gradually slowing down in front of me on the freeway

What a ritard.

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