A woman gets a small tattoo of a seashell on her inner thigh.

You hold your ear up to it, you can smell the ocean.

Why does the little mermaid wear seashells?

Because she’s too big for B shells

This girl I met on Tinder had a tattoo of a seashell on her innerthigh

If you put your ear against it and listened closely, you could smell the sea.

Say this aloud: Why do mermaids wear seashells?

Because b-shells are too small and d-shells are too big!

Why did Jiminy Cricket hide in a seashell?

He was hoping to be somebody's Conch-ience.

Ever wonder why Ariel wears seashells?

Because she outgrew the B-shells

You wanna sell seashells by the seashore?

Well that’s a lot easier done than said.

Sally can't sell seashells down by the seashore anymore...

She was busted for conch-traband.

My wife - its difficult to say what she does for a living.

She sells seashells on the seashore.

A blonde is walking along the shoreline of a lake in Minnesota looking for seashells when she spots another blonde across the lake from her. Eager for company she shouts loudly "How do I get to the other side?"

The other blonde shouts back "You're on the other side!"

I walked up and down the beach all day looking for the perfect seashell, and I found it

It was littorally the best

She sells sea shells by the sea shore

But why would you buy seashells if you're already by the sea?

When Aphrodite poses naked on a seashell she's "beautiful" and "a goddess"

But when I do it apparently I'm "drunk" and "barred from the Sea Life Centre".

What does a mathematical mermaid wear when she can't find her seashells?

An algebra.

Why do mermaids wear seashells?

Because D-shells are too big and B- shells are too small.



*A random elderly woman just stopped in the street in front off where I was sitting and told me this. Awesome*

With the rising toilet paper crisis

Does anyone know where to buy 3 premium seashells

Last time I was at Disney with my dad...

He complimented Ariel on her seashells.

She didn't have seashells. They were more of a small B shell.

A man goes to see his accountant

A man goes to see his accountant about some help filing his taxes.

The accountant: okay I'll just need some information. What do you do for a living?

The man: I'm a dentist.

A: okay, and are you married?

M: yes, i am!

A: okay, and what does your wife do for a livi...

What do you fire from underwater guns?

Seashells

Did you hear the founders of New York City were Jewish.....

Who else can buy the most valuable land in the world for 26 seashells.

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