UPJOKE
gastropodbivalveinvertebratecephalopodsnailsquidlimpetoctopusslugphylumcuttlefishradulatrochophoremonoplacophorashellfish

How does a mollusk hide from predators?

Clamouflage

Did you hear about the guy who fell into the endangered Mollusk exhibit?

An aquarium employee ran up to the railing and shouted "I'll go get help, don't move a mussel!

What do you call a racist mollusk?

What do you call a racist mollusk?

A Ku Klux Clam.

So there's this mollusk

And he walks up to the sea cucumber and he says, "With knees like these, who needs anemones!"

The IRS is investigating a seafood company in Hawaii which dealt in mollusks

They suspect it of being a shell company being in fishy business

All right, I know one joke. Um, there's a mollusk, see?

And he walks up to a sea, well he doesn't walk up, he swims up. Well, actually the mollusk isn't moving. He's in one place and then the sea cucumber, well they... I mixed up. There was a mollusk and a sea cucumber. None of them were walking, so forget that I... There was this mollusk and he walks up...

I'm walking down the street when out of nowhere a shellfish falls out of the sky

and hits me in the head. Dazed, I pick up the mollusk and say "Where did you come from, little guy?" The shell creases open slightly and I hear it say "A tornado picked me and threw me. You better get somewhere safe, it's headed this way!" I look around and see mostly blue skies, except for a few cl...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three years ago I mistakenly bought my son a giant conch shell…

I have a son who’s on the spectrum. It’s quite common for people like him to latch onto one specific topic and become an absolute encyclopedia about it. Some people choose trains, some a cartoon. For my son, this was mollusks. Interesting topic I know, but it seemed to be a pretty good deal for us b...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear about the octopus who works as a therapist? (nsfw)

He studied at Harvard medical school, graduated top of his class in behavioral psychology, and received his PHD with honours. The octopus has published many papers, and receives referrals from other doctors for patients suffering from depression, anxiety, and eating disorders. He is also highly rega...

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